


Serving for Crime’s Time

by Slimsy_69



Category: Buzzfeed Unsolved (Web Series)
Genre: :/, Angst, Backstory chapter for both bois, Denial of Feelings, Feelings Realization, Feelings develop, First Time writing Smut, Flashbacks, Heartbreak, I Can't Believe I Wrote This, I Will Go Down With This Ship, Jake doesn’t exist in this au, M/M, Mildly Tragic Backstory, Murder scene(s), Obi is referenced, Ryan Bergara Loves Shane Madej, Ryan Bergara is Ricky Goldsworth, Ryan Bergara/Shane Madej-Centric, Ryan softens up to Shane, Ryan/Ricky has Feelings, Shane Madej Is Shook, Shane Madej Loves Ryan Bergara, Shane Slowly Joins Ryan’s Criminal Life, Slightly Graphic Deaths, Slow Burnish, Smut, Steven is a friend, Then turns into a bully, There’s almost a moment with rape, Why Did I Write This?, a shit ton of fluff, but thankfully it doesn’t happen, perhaps slightly OOC, slight bullying, slight homophobia, small nod to ‘Night Night’ Bergara, some vulgar language, sorry jake :(
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-13
Updated: 2019-04-14
Packaged: 2019-06-09 18:22:21
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 9
Words: 39,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15273516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slimsy_69/pseuds/Slimsy_69
Summary: Ricky Goldsworth, a lowly criminal and killer, arrives in a small town governed by a man called Shane Madej. As Madej is threatened by the criminal, he is forced into serving the crazed man. However, to both men's dismay, they begin to become fond of each other, ending in the servant and master growing an achingly exciting love.





	1. Day 1: 15:00 - 15:30

Shane Alexander Madej, a tall Caucasian man with brown hair and an oddly handsome look to him, stood by a window looking out at the town he was mayor of. He watched most citizen's actions from here, not in a creepy way, but more so just to keep check on what was occurring in his town. And although he was pretty calm and collected with being a mayor, he still felt just the tiniest bit of ego strike him. It was almost a way of telling himself that he was able to control anything in this desolate area. No one could ever come by here and just simply strip him of his power. 

Madej stepped away from the window, striding back to his mahogany desk, taking a sip of warm coffee from a white mug. 

"This is the life." The mayor smiled to himself as he put his legs on the desk. "And no one could ever change this for me." 

But unbeknownst to him, one man was slowly approaching the lonely town, someone that was about to change everything in it. He was the pebble that would cause a ripple effect. 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

Ricky Goldsworth, an light-brown Asian man with jet-black hair, slowly approached a small town over yonder. He had changed his name beforehand, starting anew under this fake title. His criminal acts had forced him to do so, yet he had no trouble at all with it. Goldsworth was mentally unstable, attempting multiple times to kill people that didn't sit well with him. Eventually, he made the choice of disappearing from his old life, creating a pseudo persona for him to do his acts as he pleased, and with much peace. 

"Hey, can you hurry it up a little?" Ricky snapped at the taxi driver. "I got things to do. Places to be." 

The driver just glared at him, but still did what he was told. He put some more push into the pedal, making the car go faster. Dust from the dirt road began to rise up as the vehicle sped up. 

Goldsworth just got comfortable again, but stopped himself once he realized that something wasn't right. He checked his phone, finding that his destination was not even close to where the driver was taking him. He felt himself grow angry. 

"Hey, where the fuck are you taking me?" The Asian man yelled at the driver in the face. "My destination isn't even close to this shithole!" 

The driver braked to a complete stop, and had finally grown tired of Goldsworth. 

"Why don't you go fuck yourself and get there on your own!" Said the man, grabbing Ricky's bags and throwing them into arms. He then reached over to open the door, pushing him out soon after. As Ricky lay on the road, dusting himself off, the taxi driver kicked up some dust with the car, dirtying the man even more, until it finally turned around and sped off. 

Goldsworth coughed as he waved off the dirt in the air. He got up from the floor, and scowled to himself. 

"Fucking prick! If I hadn't been so distracted, I would have killed him right then and there!" 

The man looked over at the town that wasn't too far off. He sighed, shrugging to himself. 

"I guess this'll do." Said Ricky, grabbing his belongings and beginning to walk towards the small town with a dark grin. "Let's just hope they enjoy my company..." 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

Ricky had finally stepped foot onto the town's premises, and to be honest, he wasn't impressed. He found that most of the buildings were occupied with small business, and that most of the houses were erected a bit more far off, somewhere around the other side of the place. Although a finding the place to be a big letdown, he knew that perhaps he could get himself a nice house here by "discussing" things over with the mayor or Chief of the local police. 

Goldsworth headed towards a small canteen, where he found the building to be fairly empty. Aside from a few people eating and drinking at some tables, as well as a couple of bartenders and waiters, the place was fairly calm and quiet. 

He sat down at the bar, where he motioned at one of the nearby bartenders, which was a woman who looked to be in her early thirties. She strode over to him in a sort of sexual manner, perhaps trying to capture his attention. 

"Hey, big guy." Said the woman in a light, Southern accent. "I ain't seen your parts around here before. You a newcomer to this town?" 

Ricky wanted to roll his eyes so badly, but decided to play the innocent act for a while. 

"Yeah, I am. I wasn't supposed to come here, but after some small dilemas, I decided to come by here for a little rest." 

"Glad you did come by here. It's fairly lonesome in ol'e rickety Bullhead, and most of the men here are just drunks or jackasses." 

"Hmph, and what about that small other bunch of men?" 

"Oh, there's really only one man here that's okay enough for me." Said the woman with a small sigh and a dumb smile on her face. "It's the mayor. Such a fairly young man, yet he's already governing an entire town on his own. Ugh, that man is a beaut!" 

Ricky, although not intending on it happening, found himself suddenly hooked in on the mayor. He didn't want to ask about him, but something deep inside of him had him wanting to spit out more questions on this supposed "beaut". 

"So, what's this mayor guy's deal?" Despite all he tried, Goldsworth let the question out. "Is he like from a wealthy family, or did he graduate from law school early?" 

"Oh, he did come from a rich family. His grandfather first got the title, then it went down to the father, and now he has the position. Shane Madej is his name, and he was born and raised here." 

Ricky, although smiling politely on the outside, was very much grinning devilishly on the inside. He chuckled to himself as he repeated the name in his head. 

"Shane Madej... I bet this Shane guy will love to have my company..." Thought the man. 

"So, where's there a motel here?" 

"Oh, there ain't none of that here. Since we never get any visitors, motels became irrelevant here." 

Ricky gave a face of frustration, but it quickly subsided. 

"That's fine..." The man said. "Do you know a place I can go to where I can stay for the night?" 

The woman immediately giggled to herself before answering. 

"You can gladly stay with me, big boy." She stated seductively, her hips now beginning to sway lightly. "It gets awful lonesome in that old house, and with many creepy things occurring there too, well I would love to have your company..." 

Now Ryan did roll his eyes in disgust, before getting up from his seat. 

"You know what, I think I'll just try to find a way to get back to a more urbanized place." Said the criminal as he grabbed his items and began to walk out of the bar. However, as he slowly approached the doors, the bartender just began to laugh loudly. She did this for a few seconds, wiping away small tears as she recovered. 

"Oh, sugar... People that come here don't ever leave this place again. We're disconnected from the outside world. No news, no internet, nothing!" 

Ricky turned 180 degrees on his heels and gave her a face full of anger. He took a step forward, pointing his right index finger, saying, "Shut the hell up with your bluffs!" 

The bartender chuckled again. "Not lyin' at all. Just stating the truth, hun. Why do you think I'm here?"

Ricky scowled to himself again, but his mind began to run rampant. He couldn't flee the town, as it had almost zero contact with the outside. He couldn't walk to another city, as the taxi had taken him very far out from any sort of modernized civilizations. The best he could do is wait; Wait for any outside cars to stop by. 

Goldsworth decided to not stay inside the canteen anymore, so he glared one last time at the woman, before shoving his way out. 

The criminal kept on pressing forward, just looking for any sort of place that could provide him some sort of shelter. And while he did that, he failed to notice a tall man in front of him. The two collided, making them both fall to the floor. 

Ricky groaned, frustrated that he had become dirty again after having cleaned himself up a bit. The other man was not too bothered by his dirtiness, but clearly he didn't enjoy the fall either. 

The tall man arose first, sticking his hand out for Goldsworth. Although hesitant, he took the hand into his own palm, allowing him to be lifted off the ground. The two men dusted themselves off, before the taller man spoke. 

"Newcomer huh? We don't get those often." 

"You don't, huh? We'll, I'm here, although I'm not supposed to." 

The tall man, who had shambled hair with an oddly intriguing face, laughed lightly at the comment. 

"Well, welcome to Bullhead!" Said the man with a slightly ecstatic manner. "Although I don't know where the hell you can stay. Since we don't have any motels and such, I guess it'll be ok if someone else houses you for a short time." 

Ricky just nodded. He didn't want any of that, especially if it was with that overly sexual bartender. 

"I know! What if we bunk you with Darla?" 

"Who the hell is that?" 

"You may have seen her in the canteen you just came out of. She's the bartender there." 

Ricky's eyes widened in anxiety. He didn't want this, any of this. All he wanted was to get back to civilization and finally commit his evil deeds. And to make matters worse, Darla had said her house had creepy shit happening. He was a killer at this point, but supernatural stuff terrified him to the very core of his being. 

He chuckled nervously, saying, "Why don't I just bunk up with you instead. You're really the only other person in this town I've talked to." 

"Why not Darla? She's alright." 

"She tried to seduce me, even though I clearly showed I had no interest." 

The man sighed in slight shame. 

"Of course." He said. "Fine, I guess you can stay with me. But, if I find that you've been tampering with my stuff, you'll be punished immensely." 

Ricky laughed to himself. 

"Oh, you oblivious man..."

"Ok, got it." 

The taller man began to walk in another direction, with Goldsworth following suit. 

"Oh yeah, I forgot to tell you that you're basically bunking with the mayor." Said the man, matter of factly.

Ricky grinned in delight. 

"Oh, God help you, Shane Madej."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don’t know why I wrote this, but I ain’t stopping now!
> 
> Written for @/youdemonfuck on IG


	2. Day 1: 16:00 - 16:15

Shane unlocked the front door to his house, holding the door open for Ricky to step inside first. The man, in return, just gave a small hand gesture.

 

While Shane walked inside, locking the door behind him, Ricky looked around at the house. He could see many pieces of furniture, from couches to work desks. It was all very tempting to him, that he could perhaps try and get ahold of this house.

 

"So, this is your house?" Goldsworth asked.

 

Shane nodded. "I mean, it's the best I could have gotten. After being used up by three generations of Madej's, it's been kinda worn out."

 

"Are you kidding me? This place looks awesome! How the hell are you not impressed by it?"

 

Shane just shrugged, saying, "I guess I've seen it so many times that it just doesn't catch my attention anymore."

 

Ricky shook his head, but still understood nonetheless. He walked on, coming across the living room. Two couches sat opposite of each other, with a dark oak table planted in the middle of the two. Along with them, there were a couple lamps on either side of the room, a bookshelf, and a work desk at the very corner.

 

"Don't you ever get any company?" Ricky asked. "Because you have two large couches, yet they look almost like new!"

 

"Nope." Shane blurted out. "Ever since my father's death, I haven't had any visitors. The citizens of this town don't usually stop by, mostly due to intimidation. And when they do, it's usually just to discuss things quickly. You're one of the few people that has stepped foot inside!"

 

Goldsworth smiled lightly at that. Although he was a bloodthirsty man, he still had some interest in relics like this. The grand feeling that this stuff gave off just shook him with such interest. Having been raised in a not so wealthy family, big houses like this gave him a small glimpse of what a life with wealth would've been like.

 

"Well, I feel somewhat honored knowing that now." Said the man. "I would totally kill to have a house like this!"

 

Shane raised an eyebrow in mild alarm.

 

"Woah. Don't you think that's a bit extreme? I mean, it's just a simple, dinky house."

 

Ricky looked at him, and almost spilled the beans on his real deal. He was more than up for the notion of killing Shane for the house.

 

"But... Something about him just kind of makes me resist the urge... The thirst for blood." Thought Ricky very quickly before his thoughts were scattered by Shane.

 

"By the way, I never caught your name."

 

"Oh. It's Ricky... Ricky Goldsworth."

 

Shane gave him a confused look, very much skeptical of the name.

 

"Pretty odd name for someone that looks half Filipino."

 

Ricky began to grow nervous, his palms beginning to moisten up with sweat. He didn't think anyone would question the fake name often, but Shane put everything that he had started up from scratch in peril. But, the man quickly thought up a good retort.

 

"Is that racism I smell?" The asian man asked with a hint of amusement. "Because if that's the case, then you can just live your life here with the residents knowing that they're being herded by a racist guy."

 

"That's not what I meant." Shane chuckled anxiously as he rubbed the back of his neck. "It's just that you don't normally hear a name like that with someone who is clearly part Filipino."

 

"Legal name changing exists, my dude.” Stated Goldsworth.

 

“Why the heck would you need to change your name during a time like this, where anyone can easily find you wherever you are? This isn’t like the early 1900’s, where you can easily just hide under a fake title.”

 

Ricky grew frustrated, knowing very well that his identity would be revealed. He felt the back pocket of his pants, where a small pocket knife resided.

 

“How about you stop asking fucking questions, Madej?” Said the man as he gave the other a scowl. “Or else you’re going to regret it.”

 

Shane’s eyes widened in fear and worry. He stepped back a bit as Ricky finally whipped out the pocket knife. The smaller man began to walk towards him, dangerously closing the distance between them. Ricky stopped dead in his tracks, beginning to speak softly.

 

“Now, lets be a bit more civilized, Mayor Madej.” He let the words out, but they seemed to be made to mock Shane. “We can come up with a compromise.”

 

Shane gulped the ball of words that had jumbled inside his throat. He rose his hands in the air, showing Goldsworth his surrender. In return, Ricky just grinned slyly. The man finally walked right up to Shane, running his knife very carefully on the man’s soft, white skin. Shane just closed his eyes, awaiting the searing pain of the knife stabbing him.

 

“Aww, I’m sorry, Shane.” Ricky cooed to the man, caressing his face with his left hand. “I didn’t mean to scare you like that. Perhaps we can try this again, but this time, you’ll listen to what I tell you to do.”

 

The Caucasian man, although cringing with eyes pinpricked with tears, nodded.

 

“Y-Yes, sir, Mr. Goldsworth...”

 

Ricky sighed with both relief and pride as he saw the mayor, probably the most powerful person here, surrendering to him. It filled him with the toxic feeling, making him want to experience it more. He knew that it would come to him more often, now that Shane was under his control.

 

“Shane, here’s some things I want you to know.” Stated Ricky. “I want you to always be at my service, no matter where you are, or how bad the case. You will be my servant from now, until I leave. And finally, I will be taking the top bedroom of your house.”

 

“But that’s where I sleep-”

 

“Where you used to sleep!” Corrected the man. “And you can sleep in the guest room.”

 

Shane had no choice but to say yes. He felt immense shame and embarrassment now, the fear already disposed of. He had given up his power in such a short amount of time, and to a man who was only wielding a small pocket knife.

 

“Find yourself a good outfit, Servant.” Ricky commented as he began to head to the kitchen. “You’re gonna need it.”

 

Shane just stood rooted to his spot, still a bit confused. He sighed, before heading up to his room.

 

“Why the hell can’t I just report him to the sheriff? It’s not that hard!” Shane thought to himself. “But I can’t put everyone else in danger. If he truly is a criminal, he could very well kill off the entire town, given its small population and size.”

 

Shane sighed in utter defeat. He had no choice but to comply with his new living conditions. He climbed the stairs up to his room, where he skulked through his wardrobe for a nice collared shirt with a black vest. He also searched for a pair of black pants suited for this “job”, finding a slightly dusty one at the back of everything else.

 

The man began to change into the outfit when he heard Ricky shouting for him. In a haste, Shane pulled his pants up, putting only the collared shirt on without the vest. He rushed out the room, nearly falling down the stairs, and finally arrived at the dinning area. There, Goldsworth sat at the dinner table.

 

“Make me some food.” He said. “And make it quick.”

 

Shane nodded, heading into the kitchen. He knew it wouldn’t be very long before Bullhead’s delivery of supplies would arrive via a truck. When that happened, Goldsworth would flee, and things could finally go back to normal.

 

But for now, Shane had to wait this disaster out.


	3. Day 1: 19:15 - 20:00

*3 hours later*

 

Ricky stretched his arms out, letting a sigh escape his lips. He had been shifting through some old photos he had stashed inside a small pocket in his jacket. Shane couldn't directly see the photos, but he could see that they had a positive effect on Goldsworth.

 

Ricky had finally looked at the last of the photos, finally setting them face down. The small smile he had just a few seconds ago had been replaced by a grimace.

 

"Is something the matter, Ricky?" asked Shane with a hint of worry. He mentally slapped himself for feeling bad for a criminal, yet he couldn't help it. Although he was a bit egotistical, Shane wasn't really a guy to leave someone troubled.

 

"You refer to me as Mr. Goldsworth!" The man replied frustratingly. "And no, nothing's the matter..."

 

Shane raised his eyebrow in wonderment. Ricky saw him and just rolled his eyes.

 

"Just stop sticking that long ass nose of yours into my crap. If not, we'll see how bad your treatment is." Ricky blurted out as he began to head to the luggage he had in the living room. Shane just shook his head, following right behind him.

 

He could see that the man was picking out a faded T-shirt and a pair of sweatpants out of the biggest bag. Ricky began to shed his shirt current shirt slowly, but found that his servant was watching, a small blush beginning to form on the taller man's face.

 

"Privacy, dipshit!" Ricky shouted as he strode over to the man, pushing him out of the room. "And I thought you were a sophisticated man."

 

Shane still kept the blush on his face. Despite everything that was bad about this debacle, he couldn't help but find Ricky just a tad bit attractive. He only caught a glimpse of that slightly chiseled, olive skin that was the criminal's back.

 

Shane had known for a while now that he had a fond interest in men. Although he had had a few girlfriends throughout his life, he couldn't seem to find the full amount of bliss that he wished for in a relationship. They all just ended in him feeling incomplete, as if the excitement was still yet to be found.

 

And seeing a bit of Goldsworth in all his "glory" had made something inside of him click. He had felt this before, and knew that it was dangerous for him currently.

 

"God dammit, not again... Why the hell did this have to happen?" Shane groaned internally. "Why am I becoming infatuated?"

 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

 

Ricky felt himself grow a bit flustered after he had caught Shane staring at him changing out of his shirt. Although he wasn't exactly out of shape, he wasn't the type of guy to flaunt his both around. So when he saw the man gawking, it put him a bit on edge. He didn't want to stay in a house with creeper.

 

Sure, he was a killer, but he never went around stalking people. Even he had boundaries.

 

Ricky just sighed as he finally put on his sweatpants. He grabbed his phone charger, as well as his phone, and stuffed them into his pockets. He didn't have service here, but perhaps he could just go through some stuff on his phone too.

 

As Goldsworth stepped out of the living room, he caught sight of Shane, who was leaning on the wall, lost in thought. Even though the man did just creep him out, he couldn't help but still find some sort of attraction towards him. Hell, the only reason he knew his name when they first stumbled upon each other was due to genuine curiosity.

 

"Hypocrite much, Ry-" The man stopped himself from saying his old name. "R-Ricky. God, I'm basically being just as much of a creeper as him!"

 

Shane finally took notice of the other man in the hall, straightening his posture.

 

"Anything else you need, Mr. Goldsworth?"

 

"Take my bags up to the second floor, and prepare my bed for me."

 

Shane nodded, heading into the other room to do what he was told. Ricky stood there in awkward silence, and it was a bit nerve wracking. He could feel something... Something besides that telltale bloodlust he had for a very long time now.

 

Just as he tried to put his finger on it, Shane came stumbling back into the room with all the luggage. He shook his head, clearly not willing to take all of it up the stairs, so he took a few at a time.

 

Ricky just shrugged to himself and shook away those feelings.

 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

 

"Well, that's the last of 'em!" Shane exclaimed, rubbing away a thin layer of sweat off his forehead. "Is there anything else you need help with, Mr. Goldsworth?"

 

Ricky thought to himself quickly, checking with himself to see if there was still anything left. After a couple seconds, the man just shook his head.

 

Shane sighed in relief.

 

"Ok, you're free to go to the guest room now." Ricky said. "And don't let me catch you doing some sneaky shit!"

 

Shane rolled his eyes, but nodded. He bowed to the man, turning the lights of the room off.

 

And that's when an idea occurred to him. If he could scare Ricky by saying there's a ghost in the house, he could potentially get his room back. If that was the case, he could also retrieve his pistol hidden in the closet and chase the criminal away.

 

And with that finally in mind, Shane smirked to himself.

 

As he began to head to the guest room, he stopped himself and went back to Goldsworth's "room". He said, "Oh, and good luck with whatever spirit is in the room.", before beginning to walk away again.

 

Ricky's eyes widened in fear at the word "spirit".

 

"You didn't tell me jack shit about a spirit in the room!" The man shouted at him as he began to scan the room countless times.

 

"Frankly, I don't believe there's one, but my father did. In all honesty, I just ignored it."

 

"IGNORED IT!?" Ricky blurted out. "How the hell do you just ignore random noises and movements that possibly have no explanation?"

 

Shane just looked at him with a small grin. "Cause I have a sense of logic..."

 

“Something wrong, Mr. Goldsworth... Afraid of ghosts?”

 

Ricky snarled at him in anger, but it immediately replaced again by fear. He began to go into full panic mode, despite being in the same room as Shane.

 

"Well, what are you going to do now? Just stay here with the ghost?" Shane asked calmly.

 

"Yes... No... I don't fucking know anymore!" Ricky shouted once more in confusion. He didn't want to leave the bedroom that seemed so much more nice than the guest room. But he was petrified at the thought of a ghost being in the same room as him. What if he was killed by it during the night?

 

Shane just stared at Goldsworth, thinking that the plan was potentially working. He began to cheer on the inside, but perhaps he had done so a bit early, because Ricky finally spoke.

 

"Sleep in here with me..." Ricky mumbled extremely low. Shane almost didn't catch his words, but he was still taken aback a bit.

 

"Wait, in here? With you?" Shane questioned. In return, he just got a nod.

 

"Welp, there goes that plan." Thought the man before speaking once more.

 

"So, do I just sleep on the floor or something?"

 

"I guess. I don't really have a problem sharing a bed, just as long as someone's here to protect me from the killer spirits."

 

"Oh, isn't that ironically poetic?"

 

"Shut your fucking mouth, Long Legs!" Ricky barked angrily. "I know I'm a fucking criminal and a killer, but that doesn't mean I'm going to allow a ghost to do the same to me. No way, José!"

 

"I think I once knew a guy who's name was José-"

 

"Jesus Christ, can't you take shit a bit more seriously?"

 

Shane just looked at him and shrugged. Ricky sighed in frustration, before continuing.

 

"You know what, just go to sleep already. Go get your shit so we can sleep."

 

Shane was about to step out again when Ricky stopped him.

 

"And remember what I said..." Warned the man. Shane nodded, but as soon as he was out of eyesight, he shrugged.

 

*a few minutes later*

 

Shane laid against the hard wood floor, trying to find at least some sort of comfort on it. As he kept on shuffling around on the floor, he could hear Ricky breath in and out a bit rapidly, most likely due to fear. Shane kept on doing his own thing when he got an angry response from Goldsworth.

 

"I swear to fucking God, if you don't stop rustling down there!" And that's all he got to say before he was cut off by the sound of creaking wood near the other side of the bed, the part of the floor that was empty.

 

"That wasn't you, was it?" Ricky asked.

 

"Why the hell would it be me if you clearly heard me moving right here?"

 

Ricky grew fearful again and slowly moved away from that side of the bed.

 

"Did you hear that, Shane? The floor literally CREAKED in its own!"

 

"It was probably just the house settling a bit. I mean, it is old, and it hasn't seen another person besides me in a long time."

 

"Stop trying to find a logical explanation for this. It's clearly a fucking ghost!"

 

"Believe in that all you want." Shane mocked the man. "But I don't believe in it one bit."

 

"Easy for you to say. I bet you barely believe in yourself!"

 

"Aww, you know me so well! Who told you that? Darla?"

 

Ricky finally looked over at Shane with fury in his eyes. He grabbed the rim of his shirt and lifted him to his face, breathing hot air into it.

 

"Take this shit seriously, Madej!"

 

Shane gulped at the sudden realization that perhaps he went a bit too far. He was messing with a killer... But something in him just didn't want to stop. He was in the face of danger, yet he felt the need to keep on provoking it.

 

"Oh, I am Goldsworth. That's why I can sleep in here just fine, with no worry of being massacred by a spirit."

 

Ricky just glared at him, pushing him back to the floor. He crossed his arms and pouted to himself. He tried to think about other stuff, like his family, or the criminal acts that gave him a rush of bliss and adrenaline, but now the creaking kept on playing.

 

"It's fine, Ricky... It's just the floor settling...” The man said to himself, in hopes of draining some fear.

 

And that's when he heard the sound of a door slowly creaking open. His head immediately shot up, directing itself to where the room entrance was, seeing it slowly open with no one there. His eyes widened and he began to tap Shane rapidly.

 

"Shane..."

 

Shane just gave a groan in response.

 

"Shane!" Ricky shouted now as the door kept on opening.

 

The man finally awoke again, groggily saying, "What do you want?"

 

"The fucking door is opening by itself." Ricky whispered with absolute dread in his voice. "I swear to God, I can't handle this shit."

 

Shane finally had enough, standing at his full length and stomping his way to the door that was still creaking open. With a tired voice, he spoke.

 

"Hey, ghost!" The man's eyes are half open and he almost seemed drunk. "Whatever you are and whatever you're doing, I want you to stop it. Can't you see you're scaring the little wimp?"

 

"Call me that again, I swear-"

 

"Can you just shut up for a minute, Ricky?!" Shane asked loudly, before continuing.

 

"I don't care if you just want to scare him, stop it! Now get the hell out of my fucking room!" Shane shouted before slamming the door shut. He groaned again, striding back to the floor that was designated to him. He plopped himself down, hissing in pain as he forgot that he was sleeping on hard wood.

 

Shane began to close his eyes shut, already dozing off again, when he felt another tap on his arm. He sighed, before opening his eyes again.

 

"What do you want, Goldsworth?"

 

Silence played itself for a few seconds before he got a response.

 

"I just... I wanted to thank you... For that."

 

"For what?"

 

"Sticking up for me."

 

Shane lifted himself up, propping himself with his left arm.

 

"Yeah, sticking up for you, despite the fact that it was just probably the wind being the culprit."

 

"Can you just take the freaking gratitude?"

 

Shane chuckled lightly. "Sure, why not?"

 

Both men sighed, before finally beginning to calm down again.

 

"Well... Goodnight, I guess" Goldsworth said lightly.

 

"Goodnight." Slurred Shane before knocking out once more.

 

Ricky laid back down, looking at the ceiling. He closed his eyes, questioning what exactly was going on with him.

 

"This feels so foreign. I have never felt this before, and yet it feels... right."

 

Goldsworth sighed in confusion, before allowing himself to go to sleep. He kept hearing the creaking sounds, but as long as Shane was near him, he could give less of a fuck.

 


	4. Day 2: 08:25 - 09:10

Rays of blinding sunshine pierced through the windows, hitting Shane's face. As his eyes began to flutter open, he could distinctly hear Ricky snoring softly. He smiled lightly to himself before getting up from the floor. Stretching his body, Shane groaned in delight when he heard his bones crack. He began to walk towards the now quiet door, smirking to himself on the way out.

 

He walked down the steps of the staircase, walking into the kitchen shortly after. Shane knew that Ricky would nag him about being hungry, so perhaps doing this would help tone him down a bit.

 

Shane sighed to himself. "Didn't think I would have to cook breakfast for some random guy. Well, as long as he doesn't kill me, I guess it's fine."

 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

 

"What did you do?" A voice rang out in alarm.

 

"You... You killed him..."

 

"You've killed him!"

 

He could see the blood still draining out of the already dead body of a classmate. The only thing impeding the blood from flowing faster was the pair of blue scissors still jammed deep inside the boy's body. Other classmates crowded around him and the corpse, beginning to take pictures, but some just looking away in disgust. Many scared glances were shot at him, and his teacher grabbed him by the arm, keeping a death grip on it. The two began to rush to the office, where he was to be kept until the police arrived.

 

He looked back at the classroom, not feeling any sort of worry, but rather, a sudden need poking at him in the back of his head. The need to commit the same act once more. He looked at his teacher, who gave him a shameful look. He smiled to himself, feeling satisfied with what he did.

 

—————

 

It was only after his mother came to visit him in the jail cell that he did begin to feel some regret. Seeing her bloodshot eyes, the bags under her eyes dark and heavy... It tugged at his heartstrings. He wanted to repent for what he did, but that nagging feeling had only grown since he did the deed. He wanted to hug his mom, tell her why he did what he did.

 

He knew that he could most likely be let off a bit easily since his action was out of self-defense. Yet, he knew that he couldn't put a stop to these newfound feelings within him. He could try his hardest to fight it off, or shove it to the back of his mind, but it would always come back.

 

So, as he saw his mother, her hurt eyes shutting, he said sorry.

 

Sorry for letting her down by killing the boy that kept tormenting him for 6 years now.

 

And sorry for not letting go of his newfound addiction.

 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

 

Ricky's eyes slowly opened, welcoming the light of a new day. He pushed himself up, stretching his body and letting out a loud sigh. He began to rub his eyes, wiping away the dried rheum from the corners. His ears perked as he heard the sound of muffled music come from below him, somewhere in the first floor.

 

And that's when he caught the whiff of food cooking. It made his mouth water up, making his stomach begin to grumble in desperation.

He looked down at the floor, finding Shane's blankets and pillow discarded on the floor. He shook his head, stepping off of the bed.

 

He walked out the room, heading into the kitchen, where a pipping hot plate of food was on the counter, ready to be served. He looked over at Shane, who was slowly dancing to a song playing on a worn down record player, a small stack of other vinyls next to the machine.

 

"Angel baby... My angel baby..." The record sang out the words to an all too familiar song from Ryan's past.

 

"When you are near me... My heart skips a beat... I can hardly stand on... My own two feet..." Shane sang along with a silky, yet deep voice. He kept on dancing, eventually twirling around the kitchen with his eyes closed. His movements were slow, his feet gliding along on the floor. It almost looked like he was trying to dance this with a non-existent person.

 

And just as Ricky began to somewhat enjoy the display, Shane opened his eyes again, stumbling at the sight of Goldsworth. He crashed against the kitchen counter, dropping a few pots and pans on the floor. Trying to catch them, he failed, instead standing up at full height.

 

Ricky began to laugh loudly seeing Shane grow nervous, dropping the stuff, and trying to act like nothing happened.

 

"How long have you been in here?" Shane asked anxiously.

 

Ricky smiled and answered. "About a good minute already."

 

He walked over to the record player, seeing it playing a vinyl of "Angel Baby" by Rosie and The Originals. He smirked in delight.

 

"Didn't think anyone else knew about this song."

 

Shane finally began to calm down, his tensed up shoulders finally sagging down a bit.

 

"Yeah, my grandfather heard it a long time ago, back in '61, when this song was released. When my father discovered the vinyl in a thrift store during a business trip, he bought it to bring back memories for both him and my grandfather."

 

"Then my father showed me the song when I was about 9, and it's tagged along with me since. Listening to music on this old thing kinda sucks, but the nostalgia really makes the experience that much more fantastic."

 

Ricky raised an eyebrow at him. He wanted to keep asking questions, but his stomach interrupted his thoughts. He looked at Shane, who heard the grumbling as well.

 

"Welp, ready to give me my food? You seem to have gotten the hang of this servant thing really quick."

 

Shane just sighed and gave him the plate of food he left out to cool. Ricky licked his lips and began to walk into the dinning area, leaving Shane alone to think.

 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

 

"So much for a 'tender' moment." Shane whispered to himself. He had hoped, even just a tad bit, that he could get on Ricky's good side. He knew it wouldn't be easy at all, but hoped that this was a start. Shane just grimaced and began to cook himself a meal as well.

 

And as he let two sausages sizzle in a pan, he went back to the already quiet record player, taking out "Angel Baby", and replacing it with "Help!" by The Beatles. From the other room, he heard Ricky shout.

 

"Hey, turn the music up! This is one of my favorite songs!"

 

Shane couldn't help but smirk, doing what the man said. The music was now blasting throughout the house, bringing back the bubbly mood Shane had previously had. He began to him along to the lyrics, hearing some muffled singing come from the other room as well.

 

"Don't sing with your mouth full, Mr. Goldsworth!" Shane shouted over the loud music. "I don't want to use the heimlich on you!"

 

"Don't tell me what to do, Madej! I'm a grown man! I'm pretty sure I'll be fine!"

 

"Suit yourself then, sir." Shane commented, before going back to what he was doing. Perhaps he could somehow crack the hardened layers that made up this man. He would have to be patient though.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Almost lost inspiration to write this story. Glad I got it back though because I’m really starting to like this idea.


	5. Day 2: 09:35 - 09:50

Ricky had gone back upstairs after he had finished eating. Shane had overheard him talking to himself about walking through the entire town, perhaps wanting to do so in order to be aware of his landscape. At least he was being smart about this entire situation.

 

Shane looked over at the record player that had since been quieted. After the other man had begun to eat, he just decided to stay in here in silence, where Goldsworth wouldn't be eyeing his every movement.

 

And now that Shane was alone, he finally had the chance to clean the kitchen up a bit. The counters were sticky and smudged with dried up food, water, and other things. As he went to the cabinet under the sink to grab a table cloth, he could hear footsteps above him, as well as some low mumbling. Shane shrugged it away, knowing very well that Goldsworth wasn't exactly the most sane person in the town.

 

But as Shane began to wipe away the grime from the counters, he heard the upstairs room door open, and footsteps approaching downstairs. He sighed in annoyance, but stopped what he was doing and put his professional stance. Goldsworth popped into the kitchen, dressed in a black hoodie and grey jeans.

 

"Hey, I need you to show me around town." Ricky said matter of factly. "Get me to know what is where, who is what, and all that shit. If I'm staying in this hellhole for a while, I may as well make some escape routes in case I need them."

 

Shane nodded to the man, excusing himself to get ready. Ricky just waved him off, leaning against the kitchen counter to wait for his servant.

 

Shane rushed up the stairs, where he changed the sweaty button up he had with a fresh, aromatic one. He decided to keep his pants on, mostly because he found it unnecessary since they were still unstained, but also due to the slight paranoia that Ricky was watching him, either with his own eyes or with some sort of spy cam.

 

When he finished buttoning up the black shirt, he reached into a dresser, grabbing a bottle of cologne to spray on himself. As he looked at himself in the mirror, he heard Ricky shouting for him.

 

"Hurry the fuck up, Madej! We don't have all day to do this shit!"

 

Shane's mouth formed into a straight line, his eyes lowering annoyingly. He caught one final glimpse of himself in the mirror before running out the room door.

 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

 

As both men began to walk back into town, Shane thought it would be a good idea to let out some rules beforehand.

 

"Okay, Mr. Goldsworth. If we're going to have a long stroll through Bullhead, we need to get some stuff straight."

 

"Oh, I thought I was the one in charge here."

 

"Yes, sir, you are!" Shane quickly commented. "But you can't just go into town, killing every single person you see. You need to keep those... weird feelings down. If you do try and kill them all, then you've basically killed yourself off too. I promise you, you'll be out of here by the end of two weeks."

 

Ricky's eyebrow curved up, thinking hard about the decision laid out in front of him. He could easily deny the plead and go crazy, but Shane was right. Although the people here were most likely burdens, it didn't mean that some would pull a brave act and retaliate. He needed to take baby steps into this, or that one mistake could leave him vulnerable.

 

"Fine, I guess I'll keep myself in check." Ricky rasped out of his throat. "But in this two week span, we need to do some sort of crime. I need to feel the telltale high that it brings me. It's the only thing that makes me feel on top of the world."

 

Shane nodded. "We'll find you something, sir. For now, though, you need to keep the innocent act up."

 

Ricky nodded now, but the other man added more.

 

"And we can't act like servant and master in public. People will grow suspicious."

 

"Who gives a fuck?"

 

"What if they just end up thinking that we're having sex or something?" Shane said a bit too loud. "I don't want them calling me some sort of local hoe. I'm the mayor for Christ's sake."

 

Ricky scoffed when Shane finished, talking afterwards.

 

"And why should they care if we do have sex or not? It's not like their the bosses of your life."

 

Ricky stopped, giving Shane a smug look. "Plus, who wouldn't want to get with someone like me?"

 

Shane gave an look of disgust at him, but Ricky could see it was mostly just in a joking manner.

 

"You? With me? That'll be the day!" Shane yelled out loud with more humor in his voice. He slapped his knee while they kept on walking, almost making him stumble and fall in tears of laughter. Ricky just chuckled and grinned, but deep down, something began to manifest.

 

He felt his stomach want to wrench up, but pushed the feeling away before it could go any further. Meanwhile, Shane had finally recovered from his small laughing fit, rubbing away small tears out of the corners of his eyes.

 

"So, do you agree in not doing anything too crazy?" Shane asked the man, his face serious. Ricky shrugged in response.

 

"Unless I'm forced to do something crazy, I guess I'll keep my pseudo suit on."

 

"Okay." Shane said before letting himself grow quiet once more.

 

He wasn't sure what he was feeling though. He was glad that he got the mental man to calm himself, but now he had a problem of his own. That comment Ricky made had, for some reason, made his curiosity grow wild. What would fucking a killer like Ricky Goldsworth be like? Would he be demented and rough, or oddly tame and sensual?

 

These thoughts ran throughout his head, not helping at all with his situation. The attraction towards Goldsworth was only beginning to grow now. He didn't want that. Not at all! He wanted to find a nice partner that would complete him, finally fill in what he felt was missing in his life. But, in all his 32 years of living, he just couldn't find the last missing piece of his soul and heart.

 

But Ricky Goldsworth... He had something that Shane felt had almost instantly hooked him in. He wanted to get these feelings to stop, but Good God was he lying to himself if he said that he wasn't at least finding a tiny bit of bliss in this extremely scandalous, dangerous, and secretive "partnership".

 

Shane sighed to himself, knowing that only time would tell where this whole thing would go.

 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

 

The dirt road that the two men began to take was very rocky and uneven. This wasn't helped with the fact that Shane's house was outside of the town, more up in the hills where it was looking out at the town. With the hot sun beating down on them, both men began to sweat profusely after a short while.

 

"Who's the genius that decided it was a good idea to build a house farther off from the main town?" Ricky asked out loud. Shane turned his head to the man, answering the question.

 

"My grandfather made that decision." Said Shane. "And I think it's a pretty good location because I can see the entire town from here. What they're doing, where they are, etc."

 

Ricky's eyebrows furrowed in confusion, his mouth curving as well.

 

"You freaking stalker...!" Ricky joked, nudging the man in the side softly. "You checking out people like Darla or something?"

 

He got an anxious chuckle in response.

 

"No, it's not like that." Shane breathed out. "My family decided to use this house in order to keep track of what occurred in Bullhead.”

 

“And what the hell would I find Darla? She’s just your average bartender.” Shane said a little to loud. Hopefully it didn’t echo out too far where others could hear the not so nice comment.

 

“I don’t know, I just thought that perhaps you and her would be together.”

 

“Mr. Goldsworth, I know that this town is very much lonesome and does not have its fair share of women, but please do know that I’m not that desperate either.”

 

“But aren’t you worried about not growing your family tree? Pass down the title of mayor to a future son or daughter?”

 

Shane’s eyes began to grow grim. “I actually don’t know what I want, to be completely honest.”

 

“I mean, I wouldn’t mind having a kid. Having someone in the house would be so much better since I’ve become rather lonely in that thing...”

 

“But...?” Ricky interjected with the question.

 

“I don’t want to subject some innocent child to a life of isolation and pressure. My two previous family members may have been okay with it, but things have changed. The world has become so advanced, and yet here I am, stuck in a town left so far behind in history, with almost no means of escape.”

 

Ricky gazed at the floor the entire time Shane was talking. He knew what it was like to live in a world where he felt alone. Throughout his school years, people bullied him, leaving no one to talk with him. He simply couldn’t flee Los Angeles with some items. The real world was a cruel place, even more than him, a killer.

 

“Why don’t you just leave then? Clearly the option is there!” Ricky asked him.

 

“And what then? I have nothing else to live off of besides this position. It’s the only thing that’s kept me on track financially, yet slowly draining away my happiness and hope.”

 

“You can try to find a new job in society.”

 

“And become a mayor once more? What’s the point? I may as well just stay here!” Shane’s voice began to rise up in decibels, but tried his best to tone it down a bit. “I want to find something new. Something that can bring the joy I’ve very much needed in life.”

 

“You can become a criminal like me!” Ricky grinned widely, his teeth showing their lustrous aspect. “Doing bad stuff really brings a rush into you that is unlike anything else.”

 

Shane smirked, but shook his head.

 

“I said I need joy, not a free pass into jail!”

 

“You don’t get into jail if you know what you’re doing.” Ricky gave Shane another sly smile. “And I already said it, but doing so really gets your blood pumping!”

 

For a moment, just a tiny moment, Shane thought hard about it. What if he did join Goldsworth in his actions? Would that truly do what he said and bring him some sort of sadistic joy? He was genuinely curious, but pushed those thoughts away, not wanting to ponder about it anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Still not totally sure, but chapters after Day 2 may or may not become longer. (Still debating)


	6. Day 2: 09:50 - 12:15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: A bit of vulgar language and very small sexual harassment.

After a good 20 minute walk to Bullhead, Shane and Ricky had finally arrived, covered in sweat and slightly red from the sun exposure. They could see a few of the townsfolk throughout the entire place, some just leaning against wooden railings while laughing and talking, others slowly walking to their destinations.

"Your town is boring. Did you know that?" Asked Goldsworth.

Shane took a glance at him and just shook his head with a gentle smile.

"It's better than nothing." The man commented, giving small greetings to random people. The two men just kept on walking, Ricky receiving a couple of questioning stares from the citizens. He merely brushed it off, sticking to what Shane had asked for him to do.

The two pressed on, passing through cracked dirt, walking towards a police station. The building, looking fairly worn out and dilapidated, had a few men dressed in uniform, standing outside and chatting amongst each other. Shane began to walk up to them, when Ricky grabbed him by the wrist, making the man come to an abrupt halt.

"Where the hell are you going?" Goldsworth hissed quietly as to not catch some unneeded attention. Shane quickly wriggled himself out of the clutch and answered him.

"I'm just going to say a quick hello." Shane explained. "Where's the bad in doing that?"

"The bad thing is that I can't fully trust you going on your own. For all I know, you're just going down to rat me out."

Shane lowered his head, his fingers clenching lightly at the bridge of his nose. Curses were thrown under his breath before he collected himself once more.

"I have no choice. I guess you have to come along."

Ricky nodded to him, his eyes shining with an evil glisten to them. His right eye twitched briefly as he went to his pocket, giving Shane a glimpse of the knife in order to remind him of the stakes at hand. The other man closed his eyes and nodded solemnly.

Now, the two began to walk towards the small group of policemen, their attention being caught by the mayor.

"Good morning, Mr. Madej!" Said one of the cops, a fairly stocky man in his forties. A few of the others also said their greetings, before their attention was directed to Ricky, who stood by Shane's side.

"Who's your friend, Shane?" The stocky cop asked with genuine curiosity. "I don't think I've ever seen him around here before."

"Guys, this is Ricky Goldsworth." Shane replied with his hands gesturing to the criminal. "He's a newcomer to this town. Accidentally stopped by here, so I decided to let him stay in my home for the time being, at least until our daily supply truck stops by again."

The policemen all nodded to each other, the stocky one stepping towards Ricky. He, on the other hand, had his hands to his sides, where he was ready to grab the pocket knife and start slashing if necessary. And just as he pushed the knife out a bit from his pocket, the cold metal aching against his palm, the policeman stuck his hand out.

"Well, welcome to Bullhead, son!" The stocky man exclaimed, a loud chuckle escaping his lips. The others also laughed along, making Ricky retract his hand from where his pocket was. He grabbed the man's hand, shaking it quickly.

Goldsworth received a small pat on the shoulder from the policeman.

"Calm your balls, son. You're more antsy than a killer in a populated area!" The man's voice boomed with such positivity, making the others laugh. Shane stood idly by, sweat beginning to collect on his forehead. Both him and Ricky were growing anxious by the second, the entire dilema at peril.

Shane finally decided to interrupt by cutting off the laughter coming from the cops.

"Sorry fellas, but our visitor is just dying to see the rest of the town." His words came out rapidly. "So, good day men!"

Shane grasped Ricky's hand, tugging him away from the police station before the others started to delve deep into small talk.

"Jesus, that was close." Shane spilled out once they were out of hearing range.

"Tell me about it. I thought they were catching on. I was ready to shed some blood."

"Mr. Goldsworth, I told you to try and not go all ballistic on anyone here." Shane emphasized.

"And I also said I wouldn't, unless I was forced to do so." Goldsworth replied. "I'm not allowing myself to be taken away that easily!"

Shane hated to admit it, but he was right. Ricky had indeed said that beforehand. He had already forgotten about that and now he wasn't sure what he would do in a situation like that, where the cops actually tried to catch him. Almost all of him was going for him staying away while the cops handled it. However, he felt that feeling again. The curiosity of what would happen if he actually tried to help Goldsworth.

Shane pushed those thoughts away once more. He needed to focus on the task at hand, which was to present the town to Ricky. He hoped to God that happened during the short time they would be here.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

Shane grabbed a handkerchief tucked away in his pants pocket, wiping away at his sweaty face. He usually passed by the town, but never really did a full blown tour throughout the place in a significantly hot day. Goldsworth was really being serious in this little plan he came up with.

"Is that all that's here?" Ricky muttered. "Are you freaking serious? That's it?"

Shane nodded to him, giving him a shrug as well.

"What did you expect? We're a very old town with a very small population." Shane replied to the man's remarks. He shoved his hand into one of his pants pockets, where a spare handkerchief was neatly folded. Taking it back out, he handed it to Ricky, who had a thin sheen of sweat on his forehead as well.

"Thanks." Goldsworth said as he wiped away the bodily fluid. "Here."

He handed Shane back the moist cloth in a jumbled mess. Shane proceeded to grab it gently and fold it nicely before shoving it back to its original place.

"Do you want to stop by the canteen?" Shane asked politely. That questioned had received a face full of wariness from Ricky, yet he still agreed. Shane's mouth formed into a smile, his eyebrows raising slightly in bewilderment.

"Are you sure you want to go, sir? We don't have to if you don't want to."

Ricky shook his head, doing the same with a hand half raised.

"No, it's fine. I just hope Darla doesn't start some shit."

Shane nodded in understanding before going to Ricky's right side. The two began to stroll towards the canteen not too far off, the dirt beneath their feet being kicked up.

Both men walked in silence. The deadness between the two began to make an awkward feeling grow and fester inside of them. Ricky wanted to hear some sort of conversation. The lack of talking grounded away at his head, something more torturous than actual noise. And Shane finally broke the silence.

"What would you like to have at the canteen, Mr. Goldsworth." Shane asked. "Are you feeling hungry or thirsty?"

"Just thirsty. We had breakfast not too long ago, that's why."

"Opinions on alcohol?" Shane looked at him when he shot the question. "Do you want some when we arrive, or are you a clean man?"

That earned Shane a wheeze from Ricky, the noise allowing a chuckle to escape from Shane as well.

"Of course I drink. If I'm not an innocent man, what makes you think I'm a clean man?" Ricky grinned in comical disbelief.

Shane shrugged in response. "I don't know. Just because you're a bad guy doesn't mean you have to be a drinker."

Goldsworth just shook his head with the grin still present on his face.

And finally, the two arrived at the canteen. Both men could see that the building was fairly busy, people huddled in tiny groups outside. Ricky sighed a bit too loudly in discomfort, but a small bit of contact on his shoulder made him pause.

"You'll be fine, Mr. Goldsworth..." Shane assured the man with a worried smile and eyebrows lowered similarly. Ricky felt the corners of his lips start to move, but stopped himself, hoping that Madej hadn't seen that. He shrugged the hand away.

"Pfft, I'm fine. I don't need all that consolation crap!" Ricky exclaimed, his words hurting Shane a bit deep down. The man hadn't shown his hurt, but it was there now.

"Well, do you want me to step inside first?" Shane asked right as they arrived at the canteen's front. "You know, in case you're still feeling a bit uncomfortable about this."

Ricky nodded slowly, clearly not 100% with the idea.

Shane opened the door to the building, the inside dimly lit. Instantly, people began to greet the man, just like the times before this. Ricky peeked from behind Shane, seeing a few people notice his presence as well. He also saw Darla, who was behind the counter, waving a faded wash cloth at the mayor.

Panic began to set in, but he didn't have time to register it as Shane began to walk towards the counter. Hurriedly, he followed suit, feeling stares pierce his entire body. He could even hear a couple whispers, and if he hadn't decided to keep his promise to Shane, he would have gone ape shit on everyone and committed a bloody massacre.

The two men plopped themselves on some high chairs at the counter, where Darla sauntered her way towards them.

"Hey boys, how's life been?" Her voice came out like cheap silk; fake and tacky. Ricky closed his eyes and let some anger out by breathing out of his nose.

"This is gonna take a while..." Thought Goldsworth.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

Ricky wanted to cuss out Darla. That bitch had begun to really tick him off by flirting nonstop with both him and Shane. After enduring 30 minutes of shitty flirts and disgusting alcohol, the urge to kill was slowly beginning to edge its way out of hiding. God, just imagining what he would do to her... The bliss that would come from hearing her final words choking out of her blood filled throat.

Just as he felt like he was about to finally tick, his hand instinctively slithering its way to his pocket, Shane gripped him by the shoulder, stopping him.

"Darla, I think it's best that you just leave right now." Shane blurted out, cutting the woman off. The woman frowned in such a fake and annoying way that even Shane began to grow tired of her little act.

"Aww, I guess I have been going a bit too hard on you boys." She said in a sad voice.

"Yeah, you have, bitch." Ricky said to himself.

"Darla, it's fine. We were just about to leave anyways." Shane mumbled as he dug his hand into his pocket for his wallet.

"But before you go, can I get a quick hug from the both of you?"

Shane looked at Ricky, the other doing the same. Madej shrugged, but Goldsworth's face cringed up a little. However, he obliged, and the two began to do the deed. Darla was quick and gentle with Shane, a hug that lasted about 1 second, but Ricky's was different. Darla closed the distance, and everything just crashed down from there so quickly.

When she hugged the criminal, Darla went up to his left ear and whispered into it.

"I wish we could have developed into something further, cutie." She said lowly, before softly grabbing him by the thigh, near his groin area. Ricky immediately reacted by untangling himself and shoving her off of him. Her impact to the floor wasn't loud, but due to being inside of the canteen, many men around them saw and heard the commotion. They all began to rush to the three, a couple of the men helping up the horrid woman.

Ricky saw them give glares laced with anger, and he knew that something big was about to happen. His stomach lurched anxiously a bit, but his mind and soul felt something else. It was finally beginning to feel that excitement he very much needed now. Finally, after a few days of abstinence, he could finally see some bloodshed.

The other men began to close the distance between them and Ricky.

"Hey newcomer, what makes you think you can just waltz in here and push some innocent lady onto the floor?"

Ricky smirked and answered. "I think you should be interrogating her instead. She is the one that just harassed me."

"What, you don't like women?" The man tossed the question. "If I were you, I'd be more than happy to get someone like Darla to touch me down there."

Ricky cringed at the idea of that. Someone like her, going with him. Jesus Christ, how atrocious the whole thing was. He had little to no feelings for anyone but his close friends and family.

"You just some faggot from the outside world?" Another man butted in now. "Is that it? A lonely little gay boy that's looking for some dick in these parts?"

Ricky's mind was suddenly teleported back to his childhood years, during his time being bullied. He was always teased by the same guy, being told he was just a lonely gay boy that had no chance with anyone in this world. He felt truly lonely that time, and just really wished he could get someone to always be by his side, and for them to never leave him for granted.

And he learned soon after that no one would ever back him up in his life. He accepted that he was lonely, and pushed all those useless memories and feelings to the deepest, darkest reaches of his mind and heart. But those words, like triggers, suddenly thrusted everything back to him

And hearing those words come from the man in front of him, it flared up the already boiling madness inside of him. He could feel his fist clench up tightly, something that was more so of an instinctual thing, and his arm retracting back. And in a few seconds, the man was suddenly on the floor, blood shooting out in large squirts from his nose. He glared at the bloodied man, and hoped that it wasn't over. The yearning for the blood had finally come back to him.

Now 6 other men present began to close the distance between them and Ricky. A scruffy man was the first to get close to Goldsworth.

But just as the men were about to attack, they were abruptly stopped.

“Fellas, please.” Shane intruded, putting himself between Ricky and the man. “Let’s not be hasty here. My friend was just mis-”

That’s all Shane got to speak about before he was grabbed by his shirt and yanked away from the fight. His mouth suddenly began to turn into a scowl, his eyebrows furrowing. He felt himself slowly beginning to snap under the intense pressure and anger that had been building up inside of him.

He went to the scruffy man, grabbing him by the hair and tugging him away from Goldsworth. Shane lifted the man’s head up, while also pulling his own leg back, before connecting both things together, kneeing the man square in the face. The yelp and cry of pain that came out from the scruffy man alerted everyone else inside the building. Ricky saw what had happened, bewildered, but impressed nonetheless by Shane.

Now, the six men going after Ricky suddenly split into two groups of three. One went after Goldsworth, the other going after Shane.

As Shane began to step backwards, he looked around for any sort of weapon. He randomly backed into an old, wooden chair. Quickly, he grabbed it and tore its leg off, grabbing it with two hands like a baseball bat. One man began to charge for Shane, effectively dodging his first swing. But as the man pinned him to the wall, he failed to evade the impact of the wood on the back of his knees. The man collapsed to the floor in pain, his hands landing to his legs.

And just as he felt a bit of confidence in what he was doing, he felt someone tackle him to the floor. He looked up, seeing a man of about 50, keeping his wrists locked to the floor with a tight grip. Shane looked over at Ricky, finding him striking away with a bloodied and broken beer bottle at the empty air between him and the three other men. Goldsworth was slowly about to be cornered.

In a moment of worry and adrenaline, Shane put his head flat on the floor before suddenly striking his attacker on the forehead, knocking him out instantly. The third man saw what happened, and in a moment of fear, ran out of the canteen.

Shane looked at what happened, only giving a sly smirk. He then looked over at Ricky again, only to find him held against the wall by one man and the two others giving punch after punch at many areas on the criminal’s body. Each punch he received made the man cry out in pain and agony, making Shane cringe.

He rushed over to the attackers, rapidly shoving the man that held Goldsworth, to the floor. And in some miraculous moment, Shane lifted Ricky up, carrying him bridle style. He quickly began to run out of the building, hoping not to cause anymore problems. His feet and strength only allowed him to run to the town square, where his legs finally caved into the pain and gave out. Shane collapsed to the floor, leaving Ricky sprawled out on the grass top.

He slowly went to Ricky, checking to see if he was okay.

“Mr. Goldsworth, wake up.” Shane said, shaking the man’s shoulder lightly. No response.

“Goldsworth, come on. Get up.” Shane spoke a little louder, shaking his shoulders with more force now. And for some reason not yet known to him, Shane felt tears beginning to form in his eyes.

“Ricky, please. Wake up.” Shane felt two small tears begin to trickle down his cheek, a sob threatening to escape his lips. That was soon halted when he heard a mumble. Shane put his ears to the man’s mouth, his lips bruised and bloody.

“D-Desperate much, Mr. Madej...” Ricky croaked in a damaged voice, letting out a loud wheeze and some choked cackling. The noise produced had instantly brought back some life to Shane again.

“What the hell...!” Shane exclaimed. “Why the hell would you do that?”

Ricky looked at him for a moment, only shrugging in response.

“I thought you needed the humor after that shit you just went through.”

Shane just chuckled in response. He lifted himself off the ground, sticking a hand out for the other man.

“Come on, sir.” Shane said. “Let’s get you back home for now.”

Ricky took his hand into his own reddened one, lifting himself up off the ground.

“Put your arm over my shoulder, sir.” Shane said.

Ricky did as he was asked, wrapping his arm around Shane’s shoulders. The touch of his arm made Madej shiver, not only in fear towards the man, but of some other feeling.

He didn’t want to ponder on it now. Perhaps he could go back to it eventually.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

Both men stumbled on the dirt path leading up to Shane’s house, groans escaping every few minutes. Ricky was still unable to walk on his own, his body hurt badly by the assault. Shane couldn’t exactly walk properly either, as the fight had taken so much energy out of him.

And again, Ricky groaned in pain. “I hate this so much. First, I lost a fight that I hoped to win. Second, I’m punched repeatedly throughout my body. Now third, I can’t see with my right fucking eye.”

Shane looked at the man’s face, where a black and purple bruise throbbed in his right eye.

“You have a black eye, sir.”

That comment received a one eyed eye roll and a snarky comment.

“No shit, Sherlock.”

“I just thought you may have wanted to know.”

“I already did know. I got the hint once I felt immense pain near my eye.”

Shane was about to comment, but bit his tongue before he could. Perhaps he shouldn’t anger him, especially now.

And as the house finally came into their views, Ricky suddenly began to pick up his pace. Shane went along, dragging his feet along against the dirt.

Shane quickly unlocked and opened the front door, leading Ricky to the living room couch for him to lay on.

“Stay here. I’m gonna go get some medical supplies.” Shane assured as he began to rush upstairs. His first stop was the restroom, where he began to skulk through many ointments and pills in the medicine cabinet. After a minute, his hands had gotten ahold of some Neosporin and some painkillers.

He then rushed into his room, where he kept some bandages and gauze stored in his closet. As he began to shuffle through the stuff there, his fingers brushed against something cold and metallic. He grabbed the item, coming face to face with his pistol. Something was telling him that now was the perfect chance to get rid of Ricky, the man in a vulnerable state. But there was also something else that was telling him no. That doing this would break the faulty trust Ricky had put on him.

Shane sighed deeply, shoving the gun to the very back of the closet. He kept on looking, finding the bandages and gauze under some old clothes. He quickly ran back downstairs, finding Ricky still in the same spot.

“Okay, Mr. Goldsworth. Let me treat your wounds now.” Shane said as he kneeled down to the criminal’s level.

Ricky started to sit upright, allowing himself to be treated. Shane opened the tube of Neosporin, squirting some on his finger, and dabbing it on small cuts present in his face and left hand. He then grabbed small bandages to cover the cuts as well.

Shane quickly rushed into his kitchen, grabbing some ice and putting it into plastic sandwich bags, before heading back with the makeshift ice packs. He handed Ricky two, who put one against his mouth, while the other found its way to his eye.

Shane then took a peek at Ricky’s right hand, the one that was more damaged. Deep cuts ran against his palm, as well as in a couple fingers. Shane ran back upstairs to the bathroom, where he snatched the alcohol used as a disinfectant. He grabbed some of the gauze, quickly dropping some of the liquid onto it.

“Mr. Goldsworth, I’m sorry, but this may hurt a little.” Shane warned, waiting a couple seconds, before putting the gauze onto the biggest open wound. Instantly, Goldsworth began to squirm around in agony, his cries and groans resonating throughout the entire house. Shane brought his hand up to the man’s shoulder, rubbing it softly. Although still in pain, Ricky had calmed down a bit.

Shane took a nearby old shirt, tearing it into thin straps, before tying one around Ricky’s hand to keep the gauze in place.

Shane wiped away some sweat before doing the same with the finger cuts, the process going quicker.

Now that he was done with the lacerations, Shane could put more focus on the black eyes.

“Sir, could you please take the ice pack away from your eye for now?” Shane asked politely. Ricky clenched his teeth in pain, but nodded. He slowly took the pack away, exposing the still throbbing bruise. Tears wept out of the closed eye.

He put his hands on Ricky’s right cheek, seeing the bruising start from there and end at his eye. He gently ran his fingers on the man’s soft skin, and it almost felt silky and soft.

Meanwhile, he noticed that Ricky wasn’t reacting too badly about Shane caressing his face. He quickly stopped himself though, as to not provoke anything else.

“So, what’s the status, Dr. Madej?” Ricky asked.

Shane grinned at him. “You’ll be fine, as long as we take care of your wounds.”

Ricky nodded in understanding. He put the ice pack back to his eye, before laying down on the couch.

Shane smiled lightly at the sight, but his mind was elsewhere.

He closed his eyes as he pictured a peculiar image of him and Ricky, holding hands and leaning their heads against each other. His heart began to race with happiness when he pictured it, but it slowed down once he was thrusted back into reality.

“My God... It happened...” Shane thought to himself. “I... I’ve fallen in love...”


	7. Week 1: Day 3-5

Day 3: Fall

 

                             —————————

 

A boy, no older than eleven years old, sat alone at the very end of a desolate lunch-table. He was a lonely kid, not really having close friends and such. He had a few people he would talk to sometimes, but they never wanted to stick around and talk to him, instead leaving him for other classmates.

 

Ryan Bergara munched on his cold PB&J sandwich, peacefully eating away, when he felt someone start to approach him. He heard footsteps come his way, and his initial thought was that one of the school supervisors. When his head perked up, he was instead looking at a boy of his age.

 

"Umm..." Ryan murmured out. "H-Hi."

 

The other boy gave a light smile and waved at him.

 

"Hi!" The boy said. "I'm new here! How are you? Why are you here by yourself?"

 

Ryan felt himself start to grow a bit nervous. Nobody ever came up to him during lunch, especially out of random. He wasn't sure how he felt about this, but he wanted to delve deeper, in hopes to find something out of this.

 

"I'm okay. I'm here by myself because I don't really... have any friends to play with." Explained Ryan, his face plastered with some guilt and shame. The other boy's cheery face was immediately replaced by concern.

 

"Well, I can stay here with you so that you don't sit alone anymore." The boy smiled brightly as he took a seat next to Ryan. "We can talk about different things like comic books, cartoons on Nick and Cartoon Network, and a lot more!"

 

Ryan smirked to himself. He never really thought that anyone would actually try and attempt to make any sort of conversation with him. The thought of having a friend suddenly brought some sort of excitement into him. He turned to the boy and nodded.

 

"Okay!" Ryan exclaimed a bit too excitedly. "That sounds really cool!"

 

The boy smiled at him with a toothy grin.

 

"So, what's your name, new friend?" The boy asked.

 

"My name's Ryan! What's yours?"

 

"Steven."

 

—————————

 

A loud round of knocking and a door shutting made Ricky jerk awake, his one good eye rapidly opening. His black eye became encrusted in a thin layer of rheum and dried tears. He hastily rubbed his lone eye and began to search for Shane, checking the floor, only to find his blankets and pillow neatly stacked by the wall. His nose had also not caught the scent that was here the previous morning. The smell of breakfast being cooked.

 

Something was wrong. He felt it deep in his gut.

 

Ricky scrambled out of the bed, despite the bruises on his body screaming at him to stop. He began to speed limp his way out of the room, slowly going down the stairs as to not fall, before heading to the kitchen. He looked around, finding nothing. He then went to the dinning room, also finding it to be empty. And he finally approached the living room, where he found the man sitting on one of the couches, another man dressed in police uniform sitting in the opposite one.

 

His loud stumbling brought their eyes to him, Shane looking at him worriedly.

 

"Ah, you're finally awake, young man." The policeman said. "Now we can finally clear some things up."

 

"I already told you!" Shane shouted, his hands rising up in frustration. "Ricky acted out of self defense. The man was being harassed!"

 

"That's not what the others down at the canteen said." The policeman said. "And they all know better than to lie to the sheriff."

 

"Fucking shit!" Ricky thought to himself. "Just the cherry on top that I needed! Having the fucking sheriff here, framing me of starting this shit!"

 

"At least Shane's backing me up." Ricky said too low for anyone else to hear. He walked towards the two men, sitting alongside Shane.

 

"So, Mr. Goldsworth. As you may recall, you and our town's mayor, Mr. Madej, participated in an act of violence at the local canteen. It would have been fine if it was just you, Mr. Goldsworth, but it's not anymore. Our mayor has been casted into a bad light because of your reckless actions."

 

"Sir, I know it seems like I'm the bad guy here." Ricky spoke. "But clearly you haven't seen the other side of the looking glass."

 

The sheriff gave a cold stare before continuing.

 

"And that is why I'm here, Mr. Goldsworth. Shane already told me his own version of the incident. I just need you to do so as well."

 

Ricky looked over at his servant/roommate, who only shrugged lightly in response.

 

"Sure, I'll tell you."

 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

 

An hour had passed by since the sheriff had begun to listen to their side. He had also given the two an extensive amount of questions, some that he felt were extremely unnecessary.

 

But at last, the man had left them, giving a quick 'thank you' before stepping out the front door.

 

The two men sighed in annoyance and relief. Ricky slouched against one of the couch's armrests, his head and eye aching painfully. He could feel a couple tears seep out from the bruised eye, wanting to wipe them away, but fearing that it will only make it ache more than it already did.

 

He felt Shane stand up from his seat, a tap on his shoulder catching his attention.

 

"You want some breakfast?" Shane asked politely, giving him a warm smile. Ricky felt that something in himself. He felt this warm feeling again, the same one he felt when Shane stood up to a ghost for him. The same thing he felt when he treated his wounds yesterday.

 

"The same feeling from when he touched my cheek..." Ricky thought. "This horrible feeling. This feeling that only seems to bring me down whenever it's present within me."

 

He shook the thought away before it could fester any further. He didn't want to think about it anymore.

 

"Yes. Go make me some, servant!" Ricky said sternly, hoping to break away that politeness that Shane had at the moment. He didn't want any of that anymore.

 

Shane nodded at him, his face still holding the same structure as before, but his eyes no longer glowing with that same, intense happiness from just a second ago. Ricky cheered to himself, despite feeling those other feelings crying out at him from the very pit of his heart.

 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

 

Shane had decided to stay at home the entire day. He wasn't ready to go back into town just yet, mostly out of guilt and shame. He also needed to tend to Ricky for the whole day, even though it wasn't requested to him.

 

He just felt the sudden urge to protect this man... This criminal...! He knew that this infatuation was growing like an infection; An infection that was tapping into his heart. He didn't want this. He didn't want to fall head over heels for a guy that robbed and killed for pleasure.

 

Yet he couldn't help it. This thing was like a drug; Dangerous once you've become hooked on it. He needed to stop this before it could go any further.

 

—————————

 

Ricky laid in his "bed", his brain growing bored already. He wanted to do something besides just sit in bed and look through his phone for the umpteenth time. He needed another rush of excitement, despite getting just that yesterday and earning himself a beat down.

 

Perhaps he could convince Shane to take him back in town or something so that they could steal stuff. At least that wouldn't spark a huge fight like before.

 

But for now, he had to resort to looking at photos from his phone once again.

 

                               ————————

 

Just before the two prepared to go to bed, Shane told Ricky that he needed to change the bandages and clean the wounds again. Hesitantly, Ricky obliged and allowed the man to do so.

 

Shane began to unwrap the slightly dirty piece of cloth he used to tighten the gauze to Goldsworth's hand. He peeled the gauze off, seeing the wound on his hand, bloody, but clean and in great condition for the most part.

 

Shane reached over to the alcohol on the table, opening the bottle and quickly soaking a clean cloth with the liquid.

 

"I suggest you bite down on something." Shane warned. Ricky cringed in pain, but did what was suggested, grabbing a piece of shaved down wood Shane had brought just in case. He settled the item into his mouth, nodding to the man.

 

Shane lightly pushed down on the wound, allowing the alcohol to seep deeper into the cut. He could see Ricky gripping the blankets on the bed, his knuckles like paper against his olive skin. Sweat ran down the man's reddened face, small yelps and cries wanting to burst out of the man's mouth.

 

He wanted to, absolutely wanted to, grip Ricky's shoulder to show that he was alright. To show him that he was strong enough to go through the pain.

 

But Shane didn't do that. He told himself to try and let go of Ricky. He would just be THE servant, not a freaking mother or wife!

 

Shane finally retracted his hand away, along with the cloth. He took some gauze, putting it on the man's wound, before grabbing another clean cloth and wrapping it tightly.

 

He sighed, exhausted and ready to go to sleep. He quickly cleaned up the bed, leaving room for Goldsworth again. As he did that, Shane could the other man's stare. He turned to him, finding him to be somewhat upset.

 

"Is there something wrong, Mr. Goldsworth?"

 

"What about my eye? Aren't you going to check on it?"

 

Shane snickered lightly. "There's no need to worry about that anymore. Just keep putting it in ice, try not to hit it against anything, and you'll be fine in no time!"

 

And that's when he thought saw a face full of disappointment on Ricky. He quickly blinked, only to find the man's face normal and calm.

 

"Must be my mind playing tricks." Shane thought. "This crap is getting bad."

 

"Well, goodnight, Mr. Goldsworth." Shane said as he spread a blanket on the floor, plopping his pillow down as well. He headed to the lamp next to the bed, switching it off.

 

Shane laid on the floor, covering himself in his warm blanket. He felt his eyelids grow heavy, sleep beginning to take over, when he received a response to his goodnight.

 

"Yeah, whatever." Ricky mumbled, shuffling in the bed.

 

Shane felt a pang in his heart, knowing very well that that was rejection. It hurt him, but he pushed the pain away before he could think about it anymore.

 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

 

Day 4: Rise

 

                            —————————

 

A year had passed since Ryan and Steven became friends. For once, the lonely boy had finally felt happy and found a source of bliss in his life. Steven was like a light that he needed in a time of darkness.

 

And Ryan felt that Steven was his best friend. Both did everything together, would hang out together, and backed each other up. Ryan wished with all his heart that he couldn't ask for more.

 

But he knew he was wrong...

 

                            —————————

 

It was the last day of school. Sixth grade had finally come and gone, yet Ryan knew that something had started up at the beginning of the year, yet wasn't going to end soon. He had grown feelings for his best friend. Feelings that he knew weren't right at all, yet he couldn't help it. Steven always cared for him, treated him like an actual person, making him feel some self worth once again.

 

And those feelings of friendship only grew into feelings of romance.

 

And Ryan wanted to tell his friend. He knew what was at stake, but he needed to get it off his chest. The feelings had made his entire year a living hell, making him daydream too much, overthink stuff relating to Steven, etc. His life was slowly being torn apart by this, and letting it out would be the only solution and the only way he could find at least a tiny bit of peace.

 

So, when the school's bell finally rang, and every student except for him cheered in delight, he got up from his seat and headed towards his friend.

 

"Steven, can I talk to you for a bit?" Ryan was forced to speak over the cheering and shuffling of feet. "It's kinda important."

 

"Why not just tell me over break? You can come over and tell me then! Or I can ask my mom if you can come along with me right now. She can just call your mom and-"

 

"Steven, I like you!" Ryan spoke a little too loud. All the kids in their class were long gone, the teacher too busy to tune in on what they were talking about.

 

Steven gave him a look of confusion, before grinning and lightly punching him on the shoulder.

 

"Stop talking like that, Ryan. You almost got me there for a second."

 

"Steven..." Ryan murmured. "I'm not joking. I like you. I don't mean as a friend. I mean as a- as more than that."

 

Steven looked at him in shock. His reaction began to make Ryan feel horrible and regretful now.

 

"S-Steven, are you okay?"

 

He reached to tap his friend on the shoulder, but instead received a push from the boy. He began to back away from Ryan, his face full of disgust.

 

"You're gross!" Steven shouted at him. "I don't want you to be my friend anymore! Don't ever come near me again!"

 

Steven began to back out of the classroom, beginning to run away. Ryan panicked, running after him.

 

"Steven!" Ryan shouted, his voice reverberating throughout the halls. "Steven, wait!"

 

Steven suddenly stopped, turning around to face Ryan. He looked at him, and Ryan almost thought he was going to listen, when he suddenly saw a fist flying towards his face.

 

—————————

 

Ricky jumped in his spot on the bed, an intense pain in his black eye bringing him back to consciousness.

 

He felt his right hand near his eye, a small pillow above his head. His best guess had been that he had accidentally hit his own eye in his sleep.

 

Ricky looked around the room, finding it to be dark still. He checked his phone to find that it was 4 in the morning. He felt his mind already awake, not willing to go back to sleep anymore.

 

His stomach grumbled loudly in the quiet room, and he thought about waking up Shane in order to get some food.

 

He reached over, his arm extending to jab at the man, but he stopped himself. He saw the man, asleep and looking so... peaceful and beautiful. That feeling he wanted to ignore so much began to edge its ugly face out again.

 

He could see Shane's face more clearly now. Bags had begun to collect under his eyes, his oddly shaped head still oddly intriguing. His hair was a jumbled mess from sleeping, but it looked nice on him.

 

Ricky slapped himself out of the trance he was beginning to get into.

 

His stomach grumbled again, and he finally decided on something. He quickly stretched his limbs, hearing them crack into place satisfyingly. He slowly placed his feet into the floor, getting up.

 

Ricky began to head to the bathroom to freshen himself up a bit before he would begin to make breakfast.

 

"Perhaps a small change of heart will give him a surprise." Ricky commented to nothing in particular.

 

He headed downstairs to the kitchen, where he began to get stuff ready for cooking.

 

                           ——————————

 

Shane began to awake, his nose suddenly filled with the atrocious scent of smoke. He shot up from his spot on the floor, looking up at the bed to find Ricky gone.

 

He wrestled the blankets off of himself, running out of the room. He sped down the flight of stairs, jumping when he got to the last 4 steps. He hurried into the kitchen, expecting to find a huge fire beginning to consume his house, but was instead met with Ricky, smoke from a pan filling the room.

 

He could see the man trying to fan the smoke out of a window, but it was failing badly. The substance was too thick now, and any longer, Ricky would be put in danger.

 

Shane went towards the man, grabbing his arm with no warning.

 

"Hey-" Ricky had no time to say anything else as he was dragged away by Shane. Both men walked out the house, leaving the front door open. Shane turned around to face Ricky, his face annoyed, yet worried.

 

"What the hell were you thinking?" Shane asked sternly. "Why is my kitchen choking with smoke?"

 

Ricky looked unfazed by his serious tone.

 

"I was trying to cook myself some breakfast."

 

Shane pinched the bridge of his nose in anger, looking up at the sky while doing so. He mumbled a ton of curse words and complaints, before finishing with a grumble. He faced Ricky again, turning serious again.

 

"Why didn't you just wake me up?! I would have been fine with it!"

 

"Oh, whatever!" Ricky shouted as he crossed his arms, turning his back to Shane. "It's not like I burned the house down."

 

"I don't care about the fucking house! You were in a freaking room full of smoke!"

 

Ricky turned to himself around again, his face lightly scrunched in wonderment.

 

"Then why didn't you just leave me there! I could have died and you would have been off the hook!"

 

Shane stopped at the criminal's words. He felt like his tongue froze, words turning into jumbles and lumps that got caught in his throat. Both men looked into each other's eyes, looking for some sort of answer.

 

"I... I didn't want you to go. I don't want you to leave me here alone..." Thought Shane. He felt like punching himself in the brain in order to stop himself from thinking this kind of stuff. He wanted Goldsworth so badly, but he didn't want to and shouldn't have even thought about it anymore.

 

"I-" Shane mumbled out, Ricky barely hearing his mouse-like voice. "I don't really know. I could have left you, but I guess instinct kind of just kicked in."

 

Ricky's mouth formed into a slanted line, his eyelids lowering sarcastically.

 

"Wow, thanks... I guess..." Goldsworth blurted out, running his hand through his hair. The two men stayed out a little longer, allowing the smoke to escape some more.

 

Ricky stepped over to a big rock, sitting on top. Shane stayed in his spot, his mind running dangerously rampant again.

 

                          ——————————

 

Ricky sat on the rock, allowing his mind to run wild again. He wanted to tell Shane the real reason as to why he was cooking breakfast, but he bit his tongue just before he told him. He didn't want to strain something that was already beginning to wear down.

 

But why did care about wasting away something that was pulling him back?

 

"Because you know that you want this..." He told himself. "You WANT to feel Shane's hands on you. You want him to take care of you. YOU need him in order to find yourself again. You've lost everything, but only just found something worth nothing and everything at the same time."

 

Ricky closed his eyes and sighed.

 

"So much for a sinister and deadly killer..." He mumbled.

 

"Then just accept what has come to you in this debacle." He thought to himself. "If this is the only thing making you feel something besides bloodlust, then why not snatch the chance you have?"

 

Goldsworth brought his head up, his eyes catching small glimpses of Bullhead.

 

"I guess I've dipped my toes in long enough." Thought Ricky. "I'll see how well I do when I let these feelings mask over me."

 

The man got up from his seat on the rock, stumbling his way towards the house again. He could see Shane sitting on the floor, leaning against one of the walls of the house.

 

And to Ricky, he looked wonderful in this view.

 

                           —————————

 

Shane had his back to his house, his body slouched against its white wall. He could see Ricky from this distance, the criminal's back to him.

 

"Shane, you've got to stop lying to yourself." He mumbled quietly. "You know that he's the thing that's been missing in your life. He's the thing that you've been yearning for these past 30 years. And now that you have this in front of you, you've decided to shy away."

 

Shane wanted to slap himself back to his senses, but he knew the outcome. It wasn't going to change anything about him, mentally. He knew how he felt, and although he wished he didn't, he did so anyways.

 

"I don't know why I can't give this a chance..." The man went on. "Why I'm so afraid and worried about joining him. If I can keep him slightly tame, then why haven't I tried this?"

 

Shane put his head between his knees and groaned.

 

"I guess it wouldn't hurt too much to discover my feelings more..." He whispered to himself. "At least I can try and find some peaceful state of mind while doing that."

 

Shane brought his head back up, coming face to face with Ricky. He could see the man's smooth, yet hurt face. His silky skin glowing, its light brown still just as beautiful as before. The one chocolate eye he had, shining lustrously from sunlight.

 

He looked like an angel to Shane.

 

An Angel of Death and Attraction.

 

                        ——————————

 

Shane yawned as he sat at the dinner table, music playing low in the background. He hummed along to "La Vie en Rose", another song that really stuck with him.

 

"The magic spell you cast. This is La Vie en Rose." Shane sang along, his voice deepening with the song.

 

His thoughts had already gone back to Ricky again. He sat at the table for the last hour already, dinner since finished. That was the only thing he could think about ever since the morning, when he allowed the feelings he had to flow about inside of him.

 

His mind was so lost in thought that he hadn't noticed Ricky appear in the room, leaning against a wall.

 

"Hey, lover boy!" Ricky exclaimed. "I think it's time we go to sleep now."

 

Shane looked over at him, nodding in agreement. He got up from his seat, walking over to the record player and stopping it.

 

"Let's go then. But first, I have to change your bandages again."

 

Ricky obliged, beginning to head upstairs. Shane turned the lights in the kitchen off, heading up shortly after. He quickly gathered up the medical supplies left on one of his cabinet, laying them out on the bed. Ricky had already laid down on it, covering his lower waist with a blanket.

 

Shane went to Ricky's right side, tenderly grabbing the man's hand and planting it into his own. He began to unwrap the cloth, his fingers softly brushing against Ricky's. It sent a shiver down his spine to feel such soft skin, the touch of a silk cloth.

 

After the unwrapping occurred, Shane peeled the gauze off, seeing the lacerations healthy and healing up, scar tissue beginning to form. He smiled brightly at the wound, then at Ricky.

 

"You'll be in top shape soon enough, Mr. Goldsworth!" Exclaimed the man while he clapped his hands together. "Your cut is healing now! Although I do have to keep helping you with it, it won't be too long before you can start using that hand again, with some safety precautions of course."

 

"Alright, I'll just clean this with some warm water, then put the ointment on afterwards." Shane said. "I'll be right back!"

 

Ricky laid in the bed, gently caressing his cut. He could feel the bulge of the new tissue beginning to form, the new flesh red and soft.

 

"Soft like Shane's fingers..." He thought, the heavenly touch of the man's fingers taking his breath away like previous occurrences. He felt like he touched a piece of heaven, and now yearned for more.

 

"Okay, I'm back!" Shane shouted as he rushed back into the room, a wet cloth in one of his hands. "Now let me see the cut again."

 

Shane grabbed his hand again, using his other hand to maneuver the cloth onto the wound. Ricky felt himself start to cringe a bit when a firm touch on his shoulders snapped him back to life.

 

"You're okay, sir." His servant assured him in an angelic voice. "I'm here to help."

 

A smile began to crack away at the shell of his straight lips. A warm feeling enveloped his soul. For once in such a long time, Ricky felt safe and taken in. He felt like he finally had someone to complete him again. To give him the assurance of being in the hands of someone who wouldn't discard or deny him, whatever the cause or reason.

 

And before Shane could begin to clean up the mess, Ricky slowly laid back down, quickly delving deep into slumber. The small smile had stayed put, his eyes rapidly moving behind his eyelids.

 

"Goodnight, Sir." Shane mumbled as he pulled the blankets up to cover the man. He then grabbed his own blankets, laying one down on the floor for him to sleep on.

 

Laying on the makeshift bed, Shane felt himself start to drift away to his own dreamland. As he began to be whisked away, he could slowly see images of Ricky smiling appear in his dreams.

 

Shane finally succumbed to the sleep, his dreams filled with the man called Ricky Goldsworth.

 

A smile began growing on his face.

 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

 

Day 5: Fall Again 

 

Ever since the day that Ryan had decided to confess to Steven, he had become a victim of many forms of bullying. Before the incident, he wasn't targeted, but everything since had changed. He lost any friends he had started making in elementary. Ties with Steven were ripped to shreds.

 

And Steven had become the main person to bully Ryan. It started off at only simple acts, with only small remarks and small shoves or elbow jabs.

 

Then they gradually grew worse as the years went by.

 

Ryan was beginning to be followed back home by Steven and a few of his friends. Rocks were thrown at him, one eventually hitting him on the head and cutting some skin open.

 

His mother reported the incident to the school, but as always, they did nothing. Just boys being boys.

 

Ryan's mom then sat down with him to have a serious talk.

 

"Honey, I know you're being tormented by these hooligans." She stated, her eyes closing as she gripped her son's arms. "But please, don't try and get back at them. I know you want to and I honestly do too, but it won't help or solve anything."

 

Ryan looked at her in the eyes, dark bags that had formed under them. He nodded.

 

"I promise, mom. I won't do anything."

 

She laughed solemnly, her smile pained as she took Ryan into a loving embrace. She kissed his head, her small tears dropping into his hair.

 

"I hope I can keep my promise..." Ryan thought, his mind already darkening again.

 

—————————

 

Ricky felt his dream beginning to fade away as he slowly gained consciousness. His eyes were blinded by the sunlight seeping in from half closed curtains.

 

He looked down at Shane, the man still knocked out, his long limbs tangled in a jumble of blankets. A smile grew on his face as he took in the man's sleeping form, the sunlight making his skin glow.

 

"You look so beautiful..." Ricky mumbled, his eyelids lowered from the infatuation. "I really wish we could become something more."

 

He sighed as he laid back down on the bed, facing the ceiling with hurt eyes.

 

"I just can't tell you though." He continued. "I know you'll just view me even worse than you've already done so. You'll leave me alone and make me feel empty all over again once that supply truck comes here."

 

He felt a slight ache inside his chest, the feeling making his stomach churn violently. He felt his eyes start to water, his body feeling horrible.

 

A light sob threatened to flee his mouth.

 

"I don't want you to leave me now. You're the only one that's helped me recover from a wound that's only been festering since my teenage years."

 

"You've made me feel love again...!"

 

His eyesight began to blur with tears collecting in his eyes, their burning just making him hurt more. Just as he was about to continue on, he began to hear shuffling from below. He rapidly took his hands and wiped the tears away, laying back down as to appear asleep.

 

And he could hear Shane get up and head out of the room. He felt a yearn to get up and follow suit, but used all his might to restrain himself.

 

"Lord, help me with this." Ricky sighed, wiping at his face with his hands.

 

————————-

 

Ricky sat at the dinner table, his stomach grumbling eagerly, while his eyes, mind, and soul ached mournfully. He could hear Shane singing along to another Rosie and the Originals song, the tune somewhat similar to Angel Baby.

 

"I love you always and want you near!" The muffled music and Shane's voice resonated. The lyrics now began to wrap themselves into Ricky, making his heart ache.

 

"My God, I can believe that I'm relating to a cliche love song." He mumbled into thin air. He wrapped his arms around the back of his head, pushing it down to the table. He lightly banged his head against the hard wood.

 

"Hey, food's almost-" Shane stopped when he saw Ricky pounding his head on the table. "Is something wrong?"

 

"What? No! Nothing's wrong! I'm just tired, that's all." Ricky jumbled his words together too quickly. Shane raised his eyebrow in confusion, but shrugged it off.

 

"Well, food's almost ready. Just wanted to let you know." He said, before stepping back out and into the kitchen once more. The music stopped and Ricky could hear a new vinyl being put into place. He rolled his eyes in annoyance.

 

"Don't you have any other songs besides these!?" Ricky shouted. "These are getting pretty boring now!"

 

"Nope! I only have vinyls with me!" Shane shouted back. "Why don't you use your special little phone to play music?"

 

Ricky groaned, but agreed. He began to walk to the living room, where he left his bags. He dug through them, finding his small speaker in his worn out backpack. He tested its Bluetooth capability by connecting it to his phone, finding it to be in normal condition.

 

He headed back to the dinning room, scrolling through his Spotify, finding a song to choose. It took a minute, but Ricky finally found a song he really liked.

 

"When your legs don't work like they used to before." The speaker boomed in the room, making Ricky flinch. He turned the volume down a little, just enough for both him and Shane to hear. A few more seconds of the song had passed before he heard the other man humming loudly.

 

"What song is this?!" Shane asked loudly from the kitchen. "I'm really loving it."

 

"It's by Ed Sheeran. It's just another somewhat cliche love song, but my God, does it sound great!" Ricky exclaimed. He heard footsteps approach the dinning room and saw as Shane walked right up to him with a hand extended.

 

"I bet this song would be even better with some dancing." A smile beamed right at Ricky, making him cave in and agree.

 

Shane lightly grabbed Ricky's hand, their hands clamped together. Both men began to sweat a bit, but let out small chuckles to lighten the mood up a bit.

 

"Come on, Ricky. It's not that hard!" Shane said with a small grin. Ricky's lips tightened in hesitation, but he didn't back out. Instead, he began to move his legs, tugging Shane along with him. Both men had their hands locked together, but it proved to be pointless. The dancing was starting to fail and look crappy. Ricky felt himself slowly growing impatient, just about ready to tell the other to stop, when another surprise came in.

 

Shane had taken his right hand back and wrapped his hand around Ricky's waist. The man felt himself fluster from the newly found contact. He closed his eyes and began to rethink his decision when he felt another hand on his shoulder. His eyes snapped open, finding Shane's own eyes staring down into his.

 

"Don't worry, sir." He mumbled serenely, his left hand softly rubbing Ricky's shoulder. "It's okay."

 

The criminal nodded softly, allowing Shane to be the puppeteer in this peculiar display.

 

Shane swayed back, maneuvering through the room, all the while holding Ricky close to his body. In this position, Ricky felt... safe. He felt comforted and safe from everything. His nose caught the whiff of some nice cologne, as well as the stench of grease and food. It made him smile as he let his head slowly lean on Shane's chest.

 

Both men kept going, the song fueling their limbs to continue. Shane kept his eyes locked onto Ricky's, both getting lost in each other's gaze. Ricky took a step back, Shane taking one to the front. And in one quick moment, Shane twirled the other man around, allowing him to fall back a bit, before wrapping around his waist with one hand, the other on his back, stopping him. Ricky gave a face full of shock and confusion, but also held some radiance to him.

 

The music had finally stopped, both men breathing a bit heavy as they stayed in their positions. Shane gave a chuckle and a smile as he lifted Ricky back to his feet, wiping sweat off his forehead afterwards.

 

"That was pretty fun." Shane commented, handing a handkerchief to Ricky, who gratefully took it and cleaned his face. "I haven't really danced with someone like that since-"

 

The man stopped himself, his joyous face now turning serious and grim. Ricky took notice and grew just a bit worried.

 

"Is... something wrong, Shane?" He asked as he raised his hand to tap him on the shoulder. The other, in return, just shook his head and grew happy once more.

 

"Oh, it's nothing. Just my big head overthinking some business."

 

Ricky gave a small, fake smile. As Shane turned back around and headed into the kitchen once more, Ricky discarded the pseudo happiness and found himself growing a bit concerned for Shane.

 

"He's always this mature, sarcastic, and overall happy guy." He thought as he sat back down at the table. "This is probably just a thing that affected him bad. Maybe he just had a bad experience with dancing."

 

Ricky tried his best to shrug it off, but the question still clung on at the back of his head.

 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

 

Ricky pushed his plate to the side, pieces of food scattered on its surface. He laid his head down on the wood table, looking at Shane eat in silence. He looked okay, but was completely lost in thought.

 

"Are you doing okay, Shane?" He mumbled.

 

The man looked over at him, sighing, but nodding afterwards.

 

"It's nothing, sir. I am just reminiscing on some of my memories." He replied gloomily. His eyes, they looked lost and pained. Ricky could have seen it from a mile away.

 

"Ricky, suck up your fucking pride and comfort him...!" He thought to himself, conflicted with what to do. It took him another minute for him to just say "fuck it" and do what he had never done to anyone else in such a long time.

 

"Do you want to talk about it?" He asked as he grabbed Shane's right hand in his own. "I don't mind."

 

He looked at him in utter confusion, but didn't deny him. Shane gave another sigh, before opening his mouth.

 

"You remind me so much of my old partner..."

 

"Who were they?" Ricky asked.

 

"Her name was Sara..." Shane mewled out. "She was the love of my life, making me feel like my world was complete. I can't think of a day where I ever felt horrible while dating her. She brought everything that a guy needed..."

 

"But what happened?"

 

"We-" Shane hesitated a bit, biting his lip anxiously. "We separated because I eventually told her that I felt like something was missing. She was missing just one thing in her that would truly become my foundation for life. It wrecked me to see her leave in tears, running home as the liquid spilled from her eyes."

 

"And I felt even more empty after that. No one fit the missing puzzle piece in my life."

 

"Nobody except..." Ricky mumbled down to a small whisper.

 

"You." Shane finished the sentence. His eyes were glistening in the mid-day light. He looked uncertain, but yet also sure with what he said.

 

"Me?" Ricky exclaimed, his eyes scrunching up in puzzlement. "Why me of all people?"

 

"I-I don't know!" Shane put his hands to his head as he looked directly at the table. "I don't know what the hell is going on anymore. I've been feeling so many things these past 5 days that I've actually gotten lost as to how this even happened."

 

"Shane, it doesn't matter. It's fine by me."

 

He reached over to the man, lifting his head back up with his hand. Anxiety looked like it was ready to burst from within Shane, but Ricky still tried his best to comfort him.

 

"As long as I can have a servant like you, I don't care about anyone else. You've treated me like a king, and made me feel so much better than almost everyone in my life. There were only a few people in my life that truly cared about me. You've slowly made me feel cared for again."

 

Ricky could see a couple small tears collect at the other's eyelids. Before Shane could ask him about it, the man got up from his seat and opened his arms, taking Ricky into a loving embrace.

 

"Thank you for understanding, sir." He said, before untangling his arms and beginning to head into the kitchen with his cold food.

 

"Don't hesitate to call me, Ricky." He spoke loudly. A smile began to crawl in as he felt the place where Shane had enveloped him in a love-filled hug.


	8. Week 1: Day 6-7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shane and Ricky go to the town’s graveyard, where the criminal hopes to relieve his feelings towards criminal activity. 
> 
> (Shane also takes Ricky to his penthouse and he freaks it 👌😏🥴)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know, this is the time where I lowkey regret finding out about fanfiction. I’ve evolved to the point that I now write smut. 😔👊
> 
> P.S. please note this is my first time writing smut. If it sucks ass, I am deeply sorry for being an absolute ass at writing this kind of stuff. :/ 
> 
> P.S.S. Day 6 and 7 happen during the night. Day 6 transitions into Day 7 after the two get back home. Basically, the chapter starts at night and ends sometime during the morning of Day 7. Sorry for failing to clarify that in the actual story.

\- Day 6: Night of Mischief 

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

 

Ryan hurriedly limped to school, his bandaged ankle sending painful stings throughout his body. He blocked the small downpour of the Friday morning with his backpack, the rain still hitting him anyways. He kept pushing on though, as he knew that today was his final day before going off for Christmas break. And that meant a break from Steven and his little posse as well.

He tucked the semi soaked present with him deeper into his thin jacket, the object poking him a bit in the ribs.

It took a few more minutes before Ryan finally arrived at his school, kids already running inside in a hurry. He, too, began to push himself faster, his ankle pain being ignored.

"Fucking Steven..." He scowled as he began to head to class. "If it wasn't for that fucker, my ankle wouldn't be pestering me with every time."

And he still remembered the pain just as vividly.

                      ———————————

Ryan had been walking back home, like normal. He hadn't expected Steven to follow him home and to beat him up so randomly. He had come out relatively okay, but his ankle wasn't fine at all. Both him and Steven could see that a bone was protruding a little too much, so the latter ran away before he was tattled in.

Ryan decided to just keep it quiet as to not cause anymore problems for his mom. She needed the peace of mind anyways.

And now, here he was - a lonely high schooler limping to school in the pouring rain, a present going for his only friend, Helen, tucked inside his jacket.

He wished everything could have gone right today, but luck was never on his side from the start. He just hoped that fate would spare him even just a little bit of luck mercy and let him enjoy the day with Helen.

              ———————————

Helen had given Ryan a genuine thank you for the early Christmas present. And although he didn't have much money to spend on, his mom had pitched in as well. And what his friend had received was a new, pink jacket, as well as a card with Ryan giving a somewhat long thank you to her.

Helen ended up hugging Ryan to near death, tears spilling out of both of them. He embraced her with such bliss and sadness that his tears did not stop, no matter how much he tried. But he didn't care, just as long as his best friend kept close to him and made him feel like a person again.

The two had finally separated from their embrace, both just wiping away tears. Helen then told Ryan that she had to go home now. He nodded his head in understanding.

"Do you perhaps want a ride to your house?" She asked him. He shook his head in response.

"No, I'll just go walking home." He stated. "I have to go to the grocery store to buy some stuff anyways."

Helen nodded and gave him a quick smile before leaving the school. 

Ryan sighed as he watched her car pull away, the puddles below the vehicle splashing up a little. He began to walk too, his legs taking him to the store.

But unbeknownst to him, his decision would set off an ongoing chain of events.

                     ——————————

Ryan kept on walking, his pace slow. The rain had since subsided a bit, but the cold air still bit at his face and hands. He kept looking behind him, his gut telling him that something wasn't right. He tried to ignore it, but once in a while, he would hear puddles splashing in the distance, shoes squeaking as well.

He picked up his pace, eyes widened in worry, breath breaking up in panic. He looked behind his back, finding one lone person in a jet black sweatshirt and a bat in his right hand.

Ryan began to run away, his feet stomping into big puddles of muddy water. He could hear the person running as well.

He ran and ran, his legs already burning and screaming in agonizing pain, but his body was too pumped up with fear and adrenaline to actually make him stop.

And just as he felt that that he was probably going to make it back home, he felt something hard impact him right in the back of his legs. He suddenly felt them give away, but felt nothing from them as he collapsed right on top of them. He tried to get up, but only numbness was felt from his legs.

Ryan looked over at the person, his back shooting pain throughout his body as he turned around. He could see the bat raised high, the light from a streetlight illuminating the scowling face of Steven.

Before he could do anything to escape or retaliate, Steven brought the bat down once again.

He felt the immense pain in his arms, as he quickly blocked his head. And although he was screaming loudly, Ryan felt like he was watching this whole thing from a screen or something. He felt out of his body. Perhaps it was just a mechanism of dealing with the pain.

And he suddenly began to fall away from consciousness, his memories beginning to rapidly play.

He could see his mother, her face glowing so brightly. Alongside her was his father, at least before he passed. He also looked just as happy as his mother.

Then he saw himself in school, seeing Steven before he turned against him. Ryan missed that Steven so much, but couldn't help but still feel that hatred too. 

He saw Helen, her smile so genuine and ecstatic. He could see the countless tears he had shed onto his sweaters, his pants, his sink, his pillow.

And the last thing he saw was Helen again, but now she was afraid and panicked.

He wanted to question it, but a light had already begun casting itself around him, allowing him to finally succumb to the numbness.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

Ricky suddenly shot up, sweat covering his forehead. He looked around, finding the room to be dark, moonlight barely illuminating anything. He grabbed his phone, finding it to be only 9 o'clock at night. He looked down at Shane, finding him snoring lightly.

He tried to fall back asleep by laying down again and closing his eyes, but it was pointless. He couldn't anymore because he had that memory pushing itself into his dreams. It only made him feel a bit anxious about sleeping again.

Soon enough, though, Ricky felt it again. That feeling of doing something bad. It had slowly abated from time to time, but now it only festered. He needed to get that rush of excitement again just to find some sliver of solace.

He looked over at Shane again, the cranks in his mind turning already.

"If I ask him, will he say yes?" Ricky asked himself. He trusted his gut and leaned over the side of the bed, his hand pushing on the man's body. Shane only moved around a bit, but hadn't awoken. Ricky tried again, harder this time.

The man finally began to grumble in confusion, and he slowly turned around to face him.

"What do you want, Ricky?" Shane's drowsy voice made him smile a little. "Why are you even up this late?"

"So, I got something in mind!" Ricky exclaimed.

"Wow, guess I'm gonna die soon..."

Ricky grabbed a pillow and flung it towards Shane, would yelped in surprise. 

"I-" He thought about it for a bit. Did he actually want this? Was it because he needed the high he got from doing criminal activity? Or was he wanting something else?

"I want to commit a crime!"

Shane propped himself up with his elbows. He couldn't see it, but Ricky could tell he had an eyebrow raised and a slanted mouth, which would most likely mean that he'd have trouble convincing the man.

"Why do you want to do that?" Sighed Shane. "And what do you think we could do here? Here, in this small town, where almost nothing can be done without the entire area already knowing what happened."

"Isn't there some sort of area that is just slightly secretive?"

Shane began to think for a bit. The main town wouldn't work, as that's where many buildings were established.

They couldn't break into someone's house. That, too, wasn't too far off from the town. The only place Shane could really think of as a potential area was...

"Are you okay with going to a graveyard?" Shane asked the man.

"A graveyard?! Why, of all places, a graveyard?"

"It's the only location here that won't get us caught."

Ricky fumbled with his fingers, thinking carefully on the opportunity. He wasn't fond of graveyards. He didn't want another supernatural being to torment him while they were there. He had a freak out from just the house spirit alone, he wasn't sure if he could handle anymore supernatural occurrences.

"Are you chickening out, sir?" Shane joked. It caused Ricky to snap back to life and reply.

"No!" He barked. "Of course not! I'm a cold killer. A freaking graveyard won't scare me!"

Shane just grinned, shaking his head lightly. He slowly began to rise up from his place on the floor. He stretched his arms, letting out a loud groan of relief.

"C'mon short stuff. Let's see if this'll relieve you."

"Don't call me short stuff! I'm 5'10!"

Shane turned the lamp on from the desk on the other side of the bed. He raised his left brow, sensing that that wasn't the truest statement.

"Urgh! Whatever! It doesn't matter! I just want to do some crime work!" Ricky exclaimed, jumping off the bed and rushing to his duffel bag. He quickly picked out pieces of clothing that were purely black. His knowledge of criminal deeds included him knowing that dark clothing would allow him to blend in a lot better.

Ricky began to take his shirt off. Shane turned around to ask the man something, but the sight of the criminal's bare body made him halt.

His eyes slowly gazed at the man's back, the one he had only had a chance to catch a glimpse of earlier in the week. Shane felt his cheeks begin to burn, his stomach beginning to knot up from the toxic, lovely feelings.

When Ricky began to turn around, Shane quickly went back to looking the other way, playing it off as if he hadn't been gawking at the beauty before him.

"I'm... about to take my pants off..." Ricky commented, looking at Shane with shy written all over his face.

"We're both men here, Sir." Shane said, with a light grin on his face.

"But that's still pretty weird."

"Ricky, don't act like it's the first time you've changed in the same room as another guy." Shane chuckled, grabbing his own pair of black pants. "I'm sure you had some sort of gym class in school. I think you're forced to change with others there."

Ricky sighed. "Yeah, I guess you're right. I don't like to do so, but it's not the worst thing ever."

Ricky began to pull his sweatpants down, which made Shane want to look again. He wanted to, so much. These perverted feelings were so hard to push down. However, he did so anyways, for he wanted to give some respect to Goldsworth at least.

Ricky, on the other hand, had not hesitated to look when Shane began to change into his own clothing. The man wasn't exactly the most fit person he'd seen, but he didn't care. He saw this tall man with such beauty and grace.

And seeing the man showing off his bare body made him grow some very erotic feelings. He didn't want that, not yet at least. He felt it was perhaps a bit too much to get there. Shane was just his servant, his caretaker. He was his only friend left. He didn't feel like taking advantage of the only person that somewhat cared about him.

However, he decided to take one more glance. He took a mental picture of the man's magnificent body, his face flustering at the image. He quickly shed his pants, putting on the black pants he had readied.

When he was done, he turned around, grabbing his shoes and sitting on the bed to put them on easier. He looked at Shane's own pure black outfit. It was very odd to Ricky. He hadn't really seen the man in anything besides some sort of suit or button up shirt and some more light-colored pants.

He also couldn't believe this was actually happening. He didn't think Shane would go along with the idea. Though Ricky had planned on pushing the man to do the deed anyways, he wasn't expecting an actual agreement.

"Welp, I'm done!" Shane stated, turning around for Ricky to look. "What do you think?"

"You look so fucking gorgeous..." Ricky thought blissfully, before snapping back to normal.

"You look fine." He said, getting up from the bed. "It doesn't really matter anyways. Were there to commit a crime, not have tea with the Queen of England!"

"That does sound really good though!" Shane blurted jokingly. It only earned a grin from Ricky.

"You're so fucking stupid...!"

                    ————————

The ground under them crunched lightly as they struggled to keep quiet. The two had quickly headed down the hill where Shane lived. Though they had only taken about 5 minutes to arrive back down to town, they were exhausted and Shane had become a bit antsy.

"Loosen up, Madej." Ricky said quietly, nudging the man. "You'll get used to the feeling."

Shane just gave a face of discomfort in return.

"Okay, so how are we getting to the graveyard?"

"We'll need to cut through the main town first. After that, we just go left to the area where the houses are. Luckily for us, the graveyard is located more-so in the town's outskirts, which will give us a better chance of you doing whatever you want to do."

"Great. Sounds like a nice location."

"By the way... what are you going to do when we get there? There isn't really much to do there anyways."

"It's called grave robbing." Ricky said lowly. "I just want to see if I can score some good items. Maybe even get an antique watch or something!"

"Well, whatever then. Just don't make too much noise while we're there."

Ricky gave a quick thumbs up. The two men sneaked on, lightly running through the small town square. All the lights in the building were off, giving the town a dead and deserted vibe.

They continued on, eventually getting out of the main part of town. The area where the houses were established began to come into view.

Shane immediately began to walk left, going off the beaten path. Ricky didn't question it, just following after him. He could see, from a distance, a large area surrounded by fences.

The two men hurried along, being more quiet than ever. Shane slowly began to pick up pace, the dirt under his feet now crunching a bit louder. Sweat began to collect on the mayor's forehead, the wrecking feeling of worry coursing through his veins. He quickly took a look behind him, finding Ricky gazing around a little, a small smirk on his face.

"At least one of us is enjoying themselves." He thought.

The two men could now see the graveyard. The wall was somewhat high, the metal coated in a layer of black paint. Shane could see all the graves, scattered throughout the fair-sized field. A tiny shiver ran up his spine, one that reverberated inside of him despite his best efforts to push it away.

He began to have second thoughts now. But before he could tell Ricky about it, the man had gone ahead, standing right in front of the metal gates with excitement in his movements. Instead, Shane punched himself mentally for what he was about to do.

"Okay, shorty. I'm here." Shane commented, grabbing a key from his pocket. "God, it's like opening a freaking amusement park for you, isn't it?"

Ricky just grinned at the man in return. The two stepped in, Shane walking towards a small shed nearby. He unlocked that too, grabbing a shovel for Ricky to have his fun. He handed it to the man, who hastily grabbed it. Shane just hoped that nobody found out about any of this. He didn't want to make himself look worse than he had already become.

Shane followed after Ricky, who had already gone ahead and started digging up a grave a bit far off from the entrance. At least the man knew not to pull a stupid move and do it close to the entrance. It'd be harder to spot something where Ricky was.

Shane stood close to the dirt pile Ricky started to create. He watched curiously as the man had rapidly dug down a considerate amount. Short stuff packed a lot more than he had previously thought.

After about 20 or 30 minutes of waiting, Shane finally heard a sigh come from Ricky.

"I did it." He said, a smile on his face. "Now let's see what good stuff this thing's got!"

Ricky stuck the edge of the shovel into a small crack in the coffin. With a surge of energy, the man broke open the box. A thick cloud of dirt and dust puffed up from the dug up coffin.

Ricky waved away the cloud, slowly seeing the skeleton of someone once alive. He chuckled at the sight.

"What's so funny, Ricky?" Shane questioned.

"It's nothing. It's just the skeleton. You know me, Mr. Madman and all."

Shane just shrugged it off. He wasn't really surprised with the response. He was, after all, talking with a killer, albeit one with just enough emotion to still be considered an actual human and not just another monstrous murderer.

Shane just stood in his place still. He could hear a sound come from Ricky.

"We scored some good stuff, Shane." He heard the man say. "How would you like a nice, antique gold watch?"

Shane just grinned, shaking his head.

This was gonna be a long night.

————————

Ricky had already gone through two more graves in their time there. And although Shane hated to admit it, he liked seeing the man enjoy himself. His goofy grin and dirtied face looked like that of a child. Those ecstatic feelings seemed to rub off on Shane, as he only felt happy seeing the man's face.

Ricky has gone ahead again, where he  finally stopped at one grave smacked near the center of the grave. It was a lot larger than all the other ones in the area. Shane hadn't taken notice of what was happening till he actually took a second to see the grave.

Ricky raised the shovel in his hands, ready to strike the dirt, when he felt a pair of hands tug the tool from his grasp. His brows furrowed in disapproval, making him turn around. Shane had the shovel in his hands, his chest heaving oddly.

"Madej, what the fuck?" Ricky went up to the man. "What the hell do you think you're doing?"

Shane gave an upset gaze to Ricky. He whisked the shovel behind him. Ricky retorted angrily as he saw what the man did.

"What the hell's going on? Why are you doing this?"

"Don't you dare dig that grave up!" Shane raised his voice at the man. Ricky went over to the discarded shovel, grabbing it with both hands now, giving an angered look at the man.

"Why the hell not? It's just like the other ones!"

"That's my grandfather's grave! You can disrespect the other residents here, but don't even try and mess with my family!"

"Madej, if you can't handle this shit, than I'll just kill you and replace you."

Shane raised his hands into the air. "Then why haven't you killed me yet? WHY! HAVEN'T! YOU! What the hell is keeping you from doing so?!"

Ricky felt himself start to crack. 

"Why don't you kill me here, right now! Just kill me! Spill my fucking blood all over this graveyard! Get that crazy fucking high you get and murder me, Goldsworth!" 

Ricky retorted back. "I'm not going to kill you, fucker!"

He felt himself choking on his words, but he didn't let them stay stuck anymore. If word vomit came out, then it came out.

"You don't get it, Shane. You just don't FUCKING get it... I don't want to kill you anymore. Maybe I did when we first met, but ever since then, you've given me nothing but happiness and tranquility. My god, for once in my life, I actually felt something besides my maniacal feelings."

"I care about... you!" He breathed heavily with emotion. "I care about you a lot. It may not seem that way, but I do. I know I make myself seem like a heartless guy, but I haven't allowed myself to be fucked up towards you."

Ricky felt a thought pop into his brain. "I haven't killed you because I fucking LOVE you!"

He repressed that thought. He wasn't ready to confess. He didn't feel ready to say the truth. He felt a tiny bit of fear about losing all that he had gotten with this man. He didn't want to put all that into jeopardy.

Shane kept his gaze, but his expression had calmed down. His eyes shined brightly in the light, mouth slanted into a frown. His eyes grimaced as well, showing the concern the man had.

"Fuck... Ricky, look..." Shane started. "I'll be honest... I-"

Shane was about give his own response, when he heard distant shouts. The mayor's eyes widened, as did Ricky's.

"We need to go!" Shane grabbed Ricky's hand. "Grab whatever you got. They won't realize it's gone. You put the dirt back anyways."

The two men ran towards the entrance. Shane took a right, tugging Ricky along with him.

"I know a secret way." He turned to Ricky. "It'll take us back near the main town."

"Wait, you're just saying this now?"

"Well, I thought you may have wanted the extra excitement from the sneaking around."

Ricky processed that for a couple seconds, before he just smiled.

"You really know how to treat a guy well."

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•

\- Day 7: Outcomes of Truths

 

The two men stumbled into Shane's house, Ricky setting the small bag of items near the door.

Shane quickly turned a light on, coming face to face with Ricky's dirtied face.

"Go take a shower, Ricky. You're dirty as hell!" He snickered.

Ricky looked at himself, his clothes covered in dirt and mud.

"Heh, I guess."

                  ————————

Shane laid on his part of the floor, just thinking about what had happened not too long ago in the graveyard.

He grew sad, very sad. He was so close. So close to admitting. Just another minute of isolation would have allowed him to tell Ricky the truth.

Shane kept thinking, even as Ricky came back into the room. The man had only a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt on. He jumped right back into the bed, but didn't lie down to sleep, despite it being already 12 in the morning.

"Shane..." Ricky didn't face the man, instead looking up at the ceiling.

"Hmm?"

"You were telling me something back at the graveyard." He said. "What was it?"

"Oh, it was nothing. It wasn't really that important."

"Shane, tell me what you were going to say." Ricky's voice got darker now.

"I said it's not important. There! End of story!"

Ricky felt himself grow angry now. He had no choice but to be a hypocrite, straying away from what he had said earlier.

The man got up, walking to his discarded pants. He whipped his pocket knife out before walking to the side of the bed, putting the weapon to Shane's cheek. He breathed in and out heavily, but he didn't intend to do anything beyond just threats.

Both men laid on the floor now, Shane pinned to the floor by Ricky. The two stayed silent, waiting for the other to do something. And Goldsworth finally broke the silence.

"Shane Madej... tell me what you planned on saying. I already told you how I felt. How I don't know what it is about you that has changed me from the inside. How you brought in foreign feelings into my life, and I haven't known of anyone else who could have done the same."

"That's all you have to say?" The man hissed, his widened eyes staring at the blade on his cheek. "That I caused some sort of change of heart? No need to say it because you already told me that fucking shit back at the graveyard!"

"Just shut up and listen, god dammit! This situation is quite the contrary. I'm just as bloodthirsty as I was before, but you've brought a poison into me. A poison that just intoxicates me with unholy urges."

Shane raised in eyebrow in wonderment.

"Spill the beans, Goldsworth."

"I fucking love you!" He finally admitted.

"I love you and all the excitement I get from you!" Ricky exclaimed, before closing the distance between them, planting his lips full onto Shane's. The mayor, who was flabbergasted at first, eventually melted into the kiss. Shane put his hand on the back of Ricky's head, keeping him locked in the position.

He didn't fully realized how much he wanted this... The chance to finally go full animal on Ricky. Their feelings had slowly been building up after being bottled up for a week. He didn't think the other man had felt the same way. But, he didn't care now. All he wanted was to continue on, go further with the current situation.

Ricky began to lower his arm, sticking it into Shane's shirt, caressing his soft chest with hungry fingers. He could feel the man trying to keep down a cry of pleasure, his face turning a light pink. Ricky grinned, grabbing the collar from Shane's shirt, before helping the man tug the shirt off. However, Ricky felt the need to ask Shane for his approval.

"Are you sure you want to do this, Shane? I don't want to push you or any-"

Ricky was interrupted by another deep kiss from the man.

"Just shut the hell up and let me love you." Shane growled lustfully, before he closed the distance between himself and Goldsworth. The criminal now sat on top of the mayor's flat lap. He let his hips move around a bit, allowing him to grind against Shane's groin area. That act earned him a grunt of pleasure from the man under him.

Their kiss broke again. Both of their lips were swelling, their breaths hitched and heavy. Ricky went down on Shane again, his tongue running lightly against the man's chest, his neck being caressed by loving lips.

Shane gave a gasp of delight as the criminal suddenly grabbed his growing bulge, the light grip sending waves of pleasure to his clouded brain. In response to that, the mayor grabbed Ricky's ass cheeks with both hands, massaging them aggressively.

They broke the kiss again as Ricky began to take his shirt off. Shane raised his eyebrows, his eyes scanning Ricky's tone and muscular body. The sight made the man drool for more.

Goldsworth quickly went back down on Shane, their kissing only growing more deep and passionate. Shane's hands traveled towards Ricky's body, his fingers softly touching the beautiful structure of the criminal's body. Each second those fingers caressed his body, Ricky felt himself grow more worked up. He wanted to feel more. He needed to feel more.

Ricky broke the kiss suddenly, which earned him an 'aw' of disappointment. The man slowly crawled backwards, his own hands traveling down Shane's pale body. He looked towards the man, who seemed to be blushing. Ricky's eyes flared with lust as he looked at Shane.

His hands caught the button of the mayor's pants. Hastily, he unbuttoned the pants, slowly dragging the article of clothing down.

Ricky got close to Shane's area, his tongue running along his pelvic area. He could feel him squirming a bit, a soft moan escaping the man's lips. Goldsworth saw his lover's balled up hands, their grip on the blanket under them turning the knuckles white.

Ricky finally stopped his licking. It was time for the real fun.

He could see the large bulge furiously pushing against the underwear the mayor wore. He pulled the underwear down, allowing Shane's cock to slap against his pelvic area. Just the size slightly surprised Ricky, but it didn't stop him.

Slowly, he grabbed the shaft of the man's member, just allowing himself to catch the pure essence of the beautiful sight he had in front of him. After a few seconds, he let his mouth lower, the head of the cock getting enveloped inside. A groan of pleasure came from Shane.

Ricky began to slowly go lower on the length of the cock. Soon enough, he had almost the entire thing inside his mouth. His eyes watered a bit, but the lust only fueled him to continue. He quickly pulled away, stopping at the head again. He began to slowly bob his head up and down, his tongue rubbing against the shaft.

Shane kept moaning as he put his hands to the back of Ricky's head. He lightly began to push against the man, encouraging him to take his cock further into his warm, moist mouth. He could feel the tip of the man's tongue lightly poking at the end of his shaft, making him release a blissful, low growl from his grinning mouth. His closed eyes scrunched harder the more the waves of satisfaction beat his body. His mind became clouded in a state of ecstasy, making him spout of stupid, little noises.

After a couple minutes, Ricky finally let Shane's cock slide out of his mouth, slobber running down the length of it. The man continued though, grabbing the cock in his right hand. He began to jerk Shane off, the drool acting as lube and making his hand slide up and down quicker and easier.

"God... that feels fucking fantastic...!" Shane choked between moans. "Ricky, let's... ngh! Hnggh...! Take this to the bed."

Ricky complied, letting go of Shane. The two got onto the bed.

"It's my turn now." Shane said lowly, a pleasured smile on his face. "Turn around."

Ricky enjoyed the stern voice Shane gave. It brought excitement into him. He turned around as he was instructed. Having already known what this was leading to, Ricky let his upper body lie against the bed, his ass sticking out better.

Shane lowered his mouth to the man's ass, his lips planting kisses on the cheeks. He felt Ricky shiver a bit, most likely out of bliss. He continued, his tongue sticking out and running against the hole. Again, he felt a shiver and heard a groan.

"Shane, where the hell did you learn to do that?" Ricky blurted out.

"Don't worry about it." The man chuckled, his head lowering again, his mouth making contact with Ricky's hole once more. Shane began to rub his tongue a bit harder, his mouth suckling the entrance. The moans only made him push on further, his tongue dancing elegantly along Ricky's puckering asshole.

"Fuck...! God, that's so fucking hot!" Ricky's muffled voice dripped with pleasure. "Keep that up, Madej! FUCK!"

Shane grabbed Ricky's ass cheeks, spreading them apart more, giving more access to his hole. He let go of one cheek, sticking a finger into his mouth, before taking it back out. His finger slid right in, Ricky's anal walls tightening around it. He licked his lips at the sight.

He began to slide his finger in and out slowly. Every time he went back in, a moan erupted. Shane kept his slow pace. After a minute or so, he felt he needed to kick things up a bit.

A second finger went inside, resulting in Ricky yelping in surprise. Shane massaged the man on the back, cooing and comforting him till he loosened up more. With that, he continued, his fingers working their magic, their long length only making things better.

"Oh god, Shane!" Ricky yelled. "God, just fuck me already. Fuck me hard!"

Shane stopped what he was doing. He retracted his hand, making Ricky complain.

"Shane, just do it already. I want you. I want all of you!"

Shane's eyelids lowered, his smirk led by arousal. "What's the magic word?"

"What?!"

"C'mon baby. I know you know it. Just say the word."

Ricky cursed the man. "I'm not doing this-"

"Say it..." Shane's voice resonated with a pinch of darkness, yet still holding those sexual feelings. "I want you to beg for it..."

"I'm not a bitch boy!" 

"Say it...!"

"No!"

Shane just shrugged. He began to shift away from his spot on the bed.

"Wait, where are you going?"

"Back to the floor. I guess that's where we're stopping."

"Wait! But-"

"No. No." Shane interrupted. "It's fine. You don't have to do it. Have fun on the bed."

Shane grinned, knowing very well this would work.

"Shane, get the fuck over here. You can't just blue ball me!"

The man just shrugged again. "That's your problem now, not mine."

He began to lie back down, covering himself in his blankets. He tried to hide his obvious erection, showing that he still wasn't 100% satisfied and finished.

"Please...!" Ricky's voice quivered. Shane smiled evilly.

"What was that?"

"Please...! Shane, please-"

"Please what, dear Ricky?"

Ricky scowled, but he closed his eyes, his face showing defeat.

"Please. Fuck me. Fuck me hard! Fuck me like..."

"Like?" Shane smirked. He was enjoying this more then he should have.

"Fuck me like a bitch. Like the bitch boy I am. Make me yours!"

The man stood up again, his cock flopping around a bit.

"That's more like it." He said as he got back onto the bed, laying down in his back. "Now, come here. I think you already know what position I'm going for."

"Of course." Ricky nodded. He stood up on the bed, slowly going over to the man. He began to lower his body, his anus eventually hovering over Shane's excited cock. He was positioned so that he could face the man.

"You're going down without any lube?" Shane questioned.

"Came prepared, baby." Ricky winked as he put his hand under a lone pillow, pulling out a small bottle of said substance. Shane gave a look of confusion.

"Why the hell do you have one conveniently right under a pillow?"

"I get busy during the night" Ricky winked again, making Shane roll his eyes.

"Just use it already."

Ricky did as he was instructed. He popped the cap from the bottle, squeezing it over his left hand. After a good amount was in his palm, he set the bottle on the floor, his hands mixing the lube. Using his left hand, he smeared the lube over Shane's dick, making it gleam lustrously. He also used his right hand to smear some on his hole, which hopefully made things a bit easier for him.

Ricky decided not to speak anymore. He wanted to experience this. He didn't want this to just be some sort of one night stand-esque scenario. He wanted to experience the one thing that he's been starved of since he began his life of crime. He wanted love. He wanted to be loved by the man below him; by Shane Madej.

Ricky felt himself being filled as he kept going down. His lower half began to yell painfully, but his heart and his head fluttered with felicity. His dictatorial brain pushed away all that pain he had experienced at first. Only waves of pleasure had crashed throughout his body.

He began to moan in response to what was occurring. His back arched as he scrunched his face, a pained and aroused grin. The conflicting feelings made him bare his teeth, air getting sucked in and out from between his teeth.

Shane must have felt the same way, for he had also kept himself zipped shut for the most part. Besides the occasional moan or grunt, the man had kept his words inside of himself.

He began to jump up and down, the bed shaking. The headrest began to smack against the wall, the bed's springs and wood skeleton squeaking in response to the roughness it had to endure.

Ricky let his head fall back, his mouth gaping open, yet only releasing tiny gasps and moans.

Shane had been grabbing his hips with a sort of gentle strength. He could have grabbed him hard enough to leave marks, but the man, despite in this animalistic state, still showed himself to be civil and humble.

Ricky enjoyed the soft touch of Shane's hands. Every time he kept jumping, the man had let his hands be guided by his hips. Their hearts fluttered with emotion, their brains weighed down like viscous honey. Neither had the ability to talk. They could only see. They could only feel. They could only hear.

All they could do was experience, experiment with how they felt. Express how they felt, enacting what they wanted and what they had imagined.

Shane twisted his arms back, gripping onto the headstand of his bed. Ricky continued to grind on his glistening cock, the head burning with lust and leaking drops of precum. The Asian man breathed heavily, moaning with such emotion.

Shane let go of the headstand now, grabbing Ricky and lifting him up with astonishing strength. Both had been fairly surprised by this, but didn't question it any further. The taller man put Ricky back down on the bed, the pair now in missionary. 

Shane looked into Ricky's dilated eyes. He gently ran his right hand against the man's flustered cheek, lightly rubbing a small cut the man had near his cheekbone.

Ricky clasped his hands behind Shane's neck, pushing the man's head down. The two connected their lips together again, their bodies yearning to run lips with each other, wanting their tongues to combat in a romantic fight.

Shane continued to slide in and out of Ricky while they kissed deeper and deeper. His breath began to run out, his lungs begging for air, but he kept himself connected to Ricky's mouth, not wanting to let go. They held their kiss for a few more seconds, before finally letting go. They breathed heavily, their eyes still gazing at each other. Both men could just see the emotion the other had. The windows in their minds had since been broken, allowing their emotions to be conveyed and exposed.

Shane kept inserting himself into Ricky. However, Ricky could feel his lover start to pick up his pace. His body began to tremble a bit, as did his moans. He was getting close.

Ricky also felt himself getting closer and closer to his climax. Almost anything Shane did threatened to make him cum right then and there.

And unfortunately for him, Shane began to kiss him again, but this time he planted soft pecks on his neck. His jaw was subjected to the same treatment. Each one made Ricky tremble, and he felt his body beginning to tense up. And finally, as he felt himself beginning to climax, he also felt his voice come back to him. He yelled out the only word that could pop up in his brain at that moment.

"Shane!" His eyes shut as he shot his spunk. "Shane! Ahhhh!"

Cum flew out of Ricky's semi-hard cock, landing all over his abdomen and on Shane's pelvic area. In only a few seconds, the criminal had become a mess. Sweat had blanketed itself all over his body, mixing with his warm cum. He panted rapidly as he continued to scrunch his face, his hair a tangled mess.

The sight of this Ricky and the sound of his voice being yelled out in pleasure finally made Shane crack. He, too, felt his voice return.

"Ricky!" Shane yelled as he closed his eyes. "Oh God! Ricky!"

Shane began to shoot his load into Ricky. The man felt his cock pulsate, his seed being pumped into him.

Shane collapsed onto Ricky, his breath heavy and broken. He stayed there, listening to the man's breath. He lowered himself a bit, right where his heart was. Shane now let himself be hypnotized by Ricky's heartbeat. The muffled thumping relieved him.

"Shane." Ricky finally spoke. "Shane. Can you get off me? I can't really breath to well with you on top of me."

"Oh, yeah. Sure" Shane said as he rolled to his left. Ricky continued to lie down, though he crossed his arms behind his back. He looked to the other man, a small smile beginning to form. 

"So, uh... we just did that." Said Ricky. "I can't believe we did it, but we did."

Shane nodded, offering a warm smile back. The two laid back down, recovering from what had just happened. Both gazed at the ceiling. Neither wanted to speak. They didn’t want to discuss what had just happened. They were both nervous, feeling like talking would break everything and cause the thin wire of hope to snap.

However, Ricky felt the need to talk about it. He didn’t want to stay quiet anymore, at least to the guy that he had full fledged feelings for. He finally broke the silence that had tortured their ears for a good five minutes.

“Shane, you do recall what we said, right?” He asked. The other man just nodded lightly. His face was straight, but he knew the man was holding in his conflicting feelings.

“Those words...” He paused. “Were they true? Do you actually...”

Shane turned himself to face Ricky. He put his hand on his face again, his thumb caressing the man’s cheekbone.

“Don’t ever doubt those words I said.” His voice was like silk, softly touching his heart. “I love you. I really do. And if you ever doubt the feelings I hold for you, I’ll make sure you understand that I never lied, that I never falsified what I hold for you.”

Ricky smiled brightly, his eyes smiling as well. The two laid back down again, but Ricky felt the need to finally come clean. He didn’t want to lie to Shane anymore. He needed to tell the truth.

...

"Ryan."

Shane looked at him in confusion.

"Who's Ryan?"

"I'm Ryan." The criminal turned his head to face Shane. The criminal’s eyes, for once, now appeared vaguely innocent and naive. "That's my real name. That’s the real me. Ryan Steven Bergara: A man who came from a poverty-stricken family."

Shane now propped himself up with his elbow, intrigued by the revelation.

"Poverty-stricken? Real name?" He asked.

"And a man?" Shane gasped sarcastically, putting his hands to his face. The criminal just smiled, lightly punching his friend in the arm. Shane giggled from the response.

“No, but seriously, you’re real name is Ryan?” 

The man only nodded.

“What was the reason for changing your name?”

“Well, obviously, I had to switch my name. I’m a criminal, a killer! Many people I know would know who Ryan Bergara is if they found that name on Wanted posters and headlines.”

“Yeah, I guess you do make a point.” Shane whispered. “But why did you become a killer? What happened to you to make you take on this facade?”

Ryan grew upset now. His face cringed a bit, projecting the obvious feeling of dismay.

“It-” He halted his voice a little.

“Tell him the truth, Bergara!” He yelled at himself, before sucking in a breath of air, then releasing it. mmm 

“It started in elementary school...”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> owo what’s this? 
> 
> What’s gonna happen next? What will we see in Ryan’s tragic flashback? How will Shane react to this other newfound revelation? When will I ever get a good night’s sleep again? Find out on the next episode of... Dragon Ball Z Kai!


	9. Regrets and Recollections

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, I finished this freaking chapter! It took me a full week, but I did it! :D
> 
> Also, just some things to note:
> 
> \- This is a backstory/flashback chapter. Instead of separating Shane and Ryan’s stories, I merged them together.  
> \- Ryan’s backstory is somewhat rehashed. Like, some of it is straight-up just copy and pasted from older chapter flashbacks.  
> \- There is almost an instance of rape. Although it doesn’t happen (Thank God), I still feel the need to warn any readers that may feel uncomfortable with that.  
> \- I am sorry if this chapter kinda sucks. I had so much trouble writing it. :/

\- Day ???: _Ryan Steven B_ _ergara_

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

A boy, no older than eleven years old, sat alone at the very end of a desolate lunch-table. He was a lonely kid, not really having close friends and such. He had a few people he would talk to sometimes, but they never wanted to stick around and talk to him, instead leaving him for other classmates.

Ryan Bergara munched on his cold PB&J sandwich, peacefully eating away, when he felt someone start to approach him. He heard footsteps come his way, and his initial thought was that one of the school supervisors. When his head perked up, he was instead looking at a boy of his age.

"Umm..." Ryan murmured out. "H-Hi."

The other boy gave a light smile and waved at him.

"Hi!" The boy said. "I'm new here! How are you? Why are you here by yourself?"

Ryan felt himself start to grow a bit nervous. Nobody ever came up to him during lunch, especially out of random. He wasn't sure how he felt about this, but he wanted to delve deeper, in hopes to find something out of this.

"I'm okay. I'm here by myself because I don't really... have any friends to play with." Explained Ryan, his face plastered with some guilt and shame. The other boy's cheery face was immediately replaced by concern.

"Well, I can stay here with you so that you don't sit alone anymore." The boy smiled brightly as he took a seat next to Ryan. "We can talk about different things like comic books, cartoons on Nick and Cartoon Network, and a lot more!"

Ryan smirked to himself. He never really thought that anyone would actually try and attempt to make any sort of conversation with him. The thought of having a friend suddenly brought some sort of excitement into him. He turned to the boy and nodded.

"Okay!" Ryan exclaimed a bit too excitedly. "That sounds really cool!"

The boy smiled at him with a toothy grin.

"So, what's your name, new friend?" The boy asked.

"My name's Ryan! What's yours?"

"Steven."

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

A year had passed since Ryan and Steven became friends. For once, the lonely boy had finally felt happy and found a source of bliss in his life. Steven was like a light that he needed in a time of darkness. 

And Ryan felt that Steven was his best friend. Both did everything together, would hang out together, and backed each other up. Ryan wished with all his heart that he couldn't ask for more.

But he knew he was wrong...

* * *

 It was the last day of school. Sixth grade had finally come and gone, yet Ryan knew that something had started up at the beginning of the year, yet wasn't going to end soon. He had grown feelings for his best friend. Feelings that he knew weren't right at all, yet he couldn't help it. Steven always cared for him, treated him like an actual person, making him feel some self worth once again.

And those feelings of friendship only grew into feelings of romance.

And Ryan wanted to tell his friend. He knew what was at stake, but he needed to get it off his chest. The feelings had made his entire year a living hell, making him daydream too much, overthink stuff relating to Steven, etc. His life was slowly being torn apart by this, and letting it out would be the only solution and the only way he could find at least a tiny bit of peace.

So, when the school's bell finally rang, and every student except for him cheered in delight, he got up from his seat and headed towards his friend.

"Steven, can I talk to you for a bit?" Ryan was forced to speak over the cheering and shuffling of feet. "It's kinda important."

"Why not just tell me over break? You can come over and tell me then! Or I can ask my mom if you can come along with me right now. She can just call your mom and-"

"Steven, I like you!" Ryan spoke a little too loud. All the kids in their class were long gone, the teacher too busy to tune in on what they were talking about.

Steven gave him a look of confusion, before grinning and lightly punching him on the shoulder.

"Stop talking like that, Ryan. You almost got me there for a second."

"Steven..." Ryan murmured. "I'm not joking. I like you. I don't mean as a friend. I mean as a- as more than that."

Steven looked at him in shock. His reaction began to make Ryan feel horrible and regretful now.

"S-Steven, are you okay?"

He reached to tap his friend on the shoulder, but instead received a push from the boy. He began to back away from Ryan, his face full of disgust.

"You're gross!" Steven shouted at him. "I don't want you to be my friend anymore! Don't ever come near me again!" 

Steven began to back out of the classroom, beginning to run away. Ryan panicked, running after him.

"Steven!" Ryan shouted, his voice reverberating throughout the halls. "Steven, wait!"

Steven suddenly stopped, turning around to face Ryan. He looked at him, and Ryan almost thought he was going to listen, when he suddenly saw a fist flying towards his face.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

Ever since the day that Ryan had decided to confess to Steven, he had become a victim of many forms of bullying. Before the incident, he wasn't targeted, but everything since had changed. He lost any friends he had started making in elementary. Ties with Steven were ripped to shreds. 

And Steven had become the main person to bully Ryan. It started off at only simple acts, with only small remarks and small shoves or elbow jabs.

Then they gradually grew worse as the years went by.

Ryan was beginning to be followed back home by Steven and a few of his friends. Rocks were thrown at him, one eventually hitting him on the head and cutting some skin open.

His mother reported the incident to the school, but as always, they did nothing. Just boys being boys.

Ryan's mom then sat down with him to have a serious talk.

"Honey, I know you're being tormented by these hooligans." She stated, her eyes closing as she gripped her son's arms. "But please, don't try and get back at them. I know you want to and I honestly do too, but it won't help or solve anything."

Ryan looked at her in the eyes, dark bags that had formed under them. He nodded. 

"I promise, mom. I won't do anything."

She laughed solemnly, her smile pained as she took Ryan into a loving embrace. She kissed his head, her small tears dropping into his hair.

"I hope I can keep my promise..." Ryan thought, his mind already darkening again.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

Ryan hurriedly limped to school, his bandaged ankle sending painful stings throughout his body. He blocked the small downpour of the Friday morning with his backpack, the rain still hitting him anyways. He kept pushing on though, as he knew that today was his final day before going off for Christmas break. And that meant a break from Steven and his little posse as well. 

He tucked the semi soaked present with him deeper into his thin jacket, the object poking him a bit in the ribs.

It took a few more minutes before Ryan finally arrived at his school, kids already running inside in a hurry. He, too, began to push himself faster, his ankle pain being ignored.

"Fucking Steven..." He scowled as he began to head to class. "If it wasn't for that fucker, my ankle wouldn't be pestering me with every step."

And he still remembered the pain just as vividly. Ryan would never forget that moment.

* * *

Ryan had been walking back home, like normal. He hadn't expected Steven to follow him home and to beat him up so randomly. He had come out relatively okay, but his ankle wasn't fine at all. Both him and Steven could see that a bone was protruding a little too much, so the latter ran away before he was tattled in. 

Ryan decided to just keep it quiet as to not cause anymore problems for his mom. She needed the peace of mind anyways.

And now, here he was - a lonely high schooler limping to school in the pouring rain, a present going for his only friend, Helen, tucked inside his jacket.

He wished everything could have gone right today, but luck was never on his side from the start. He just hoped that fate would spare him even just a little bit of luck mercy and let him enjoy the day with Helen.

* * *

Helen had given Ryan a genuine thank you for the early Christmas present. And although he didn't have much money to spend on, his mom had pitched in as well. And what his friend had received was a new, pink jacket, as well as a card with Ryan giving a somewhat long thank you to her. 

Helen ended up hugging Ryan to near death, tears spilling out of both of them. He embraced her with such bliss and sadness that his tears did not stop, no matter how much he tried. But he didn't care, just as long as his best friend kept close to him and made him feel like a person again.

The two had finally separated from their embrace, both just wiping away tears. Helen then told Ryan that she had to go home now. He nodded his head in understanding.

"Do you perhaps want a ride to your house?" She asked him. He shook his head in response.

"No, I'll just go walking home." He stated. "I have to go to the grocery store to buy some stuff anyways."

Helen nodded and gave him a quick smile before leaving the school.

Ryan sighed as he watched her car pull away, the puddles below the vehicle splashing up a little. He began to walk too, his legs taking him to the store.

But unbeknownst to him, his decision would set off an ongoing chain of events.

* * *

Ryan kept on walking, his pace slow. The rain had since subsided a bit, but the cold air still bit at his face and hands. He kept looking behind him, his gut telling him that something wasn't right. He tried to ignore it, but once in a while, he would hear puddles splashing in the distance, shoes squeaking as well. 

He picked up his pace, eyes widened in worry, breath breaking up in panic. He looked behind his back, finding one lone person in a jet black sweatshirt and a bat in his right hand.

Ryan began to run away, his feet stomping into big puddles of muddy water. He could hear the person running as well.

He ran and ran, his legs already burning and screaming in agonizing pain, but his body was too pumped up with fear and adrenaline to actually make him stop.

And just as he felt that that he was probably going to make it back home, he felt something hard impact him right in the back of his legs. He suddenly felt them give away, but felt nothing from them as he collapsed right on top of them. He tried to get up, but only numbness was felt from his legs.

Ryan looked over at the person, his back shooting pain throughout his body as he turned around. He could see the bat raised high, the light from a streetlight illuminating the scowling face of Steven. 

Before he could do anything to escape or retaliate, Steven brought the bat down once again.

He felt the immense pain in his arms, as he quickly blocked his head. And although he was screaming loudly, Ryan felt like he was watching this whole thing from a screen or something. He felt out of his body. Perhaps it was just a mechanism of dealing with the pain.

And he suddenly began to fall away from consciousness, his memories beginning to rapidly play.

He could see his mother, her face glowing so brightly. Alongside her was his father, at least before he passed. He also looked just as happy as his mother.

Then he saw himself in school, seeing Steven before he turned against him. Ryan missed that Steven so much, but couldn't help but still feel that hatred too.

He saw Helen, her smile so genuine and ecstatic. He could see the countless tears he had shed onto his sweaters, his pants, his sink, his pillow.

And the last thing he saw was Helen again, but now she was afraid and panicked.

He wanted to question it, but a light had already begun casting itself around him, allowing him to finally succumb to the numbness.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

"Wake up..."

A voice came through his deafened ears. It was so soft, so nice.

"Please, wake up..."

His brain began to connect that voice with a person.

"Helen..." He accidentally tried to mumble the name of his friend. He could hear a tiny gasp and a yell. Muffled sounds came through now, but he felt everything beginning to clear up. He could hear a bit better now. He could hear the sounds of loud voices, and the sound of soft crying.

His eyes began to flutter open, white light inundating his vision. He squinted as he finally came to.

"He's awake!" He could hear Helen exclaim, seeing her hug his sickly-looking mom. They both cried as they let go of each other, coming into his direct vision.

He finally felt some words tumble into his head.

"Mom...?" His voice came out raspy. "Helen...?"

"Ryan, we're here honey!" His mom choked, her hand softly running through his hair. "You're okay now"

His eyebrows lowered. What had happened?"

"Why am I here?"

Now, Helen began to speak.

"You... were beaten. Steven assaulted you with a baseball bat."

"Steven?" The name rang within his mind. Suddenly, everything began to rush back into place. He remembered what had happened now. He remembered giving Helen her gift. He remembered walking home late by himself. He even remembered the immense pain that had shot through his body when it happened.

"Steven...!" His voice hissed darkly at the name. "It's because of that asshole that I'm here!"

"Ryan, calm down." His mom said. "Don't work yourself up over him."

"But he did this to me, mom!" His voice rose a bit, his face beginning to fluster. "I almost died because of that FUCKER!"

"Ryan, do not use that language!"

"I don't care about that now! My safety is on the line here, mom! I don't want a repeat of... this!"

His mother turned away now, her eyes watering a bit.

"Ay, madre de Dios..." She mumbled in Spanish, sniffling lightly. "Que hago?"

"Mom..." He sighed deeply. "Please... We need to do something. I can't-"

He paused. "I can't keep suffering like this."

"I know, mijo... I know..." She closed her eyes. "I just don't want him to hold a grudge against you, even more than the one he already has against you."

"At this point, it doesn't matter. There's only two choices I have. I can just stop Steven by getting the authorities involved."

"Or I'm gonna start defending myself."

His mom shook her head, not speaking anymore. Helen just stood there, prying her eyes away from what had happened.

He didn't want to hurt his mother by doing this. He needed to though. He needed to do something about him.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

Ryan came back to his normal, mundane life after a couple weeks of rest. Though he still had some pain, he endured it. He didn't want to burden his mother anymore than she had already been. He just wanted to go to school and get through with the day.

Ryan approached the school's entrance. He could just feel the stares of the other students. He didn't like the feeling at all. He didn't want to be noticed. He just wanted to be left alone and unbothered.

He heard some light mumbling from a few people he passed by. His broken left arm didn't help at all in giving him some peace.

Ryan tried his best to block out the unnecessary attention, just continuing to walk around the campus, heading towards his first period.

He heard footsteps approach him, and he began to tense up. He wasn't sure who was going towards him.

"Ryan!" Helen's voice called out. "Ryan! Hold on!"

He stopped in his tracks. He breathed out in relief, turning around with a smile on his face.

"Oh, it's just you, Helen." He sighed. "I thought it was..."

"No, it wasn't. You don't have to worry about him. I'm making sure that asshole doesn't do anything to you anymore."

"Helen, thanks for doing this." He smiled softly. "I really appreciate it."

"But I'll be honest, he's not going to stop" Ryan admitted. "The guy's just a stubborn piece of shit. He'll find ways to torment me still. Who knows, maybe he'll even go back to hurting me physically again."

"Ryan, please, don't say that!"

"But it's true, Helen!" His voice quivered a tiny bit. "He's not gonna stop! He's tormented me nonstop for the last 6 years! He won't stop just because he was given a smack on the hand. The guy's a freaking psycho!"

Helen closed her eyes, but nodded. She understood that his claim was true. She had seen it happen, after all. She had witnessed the hell that Ryan endured, watching meekly for only a mere year.

"I-" She let her words form in mind more. "I know... I know that he's that. But what can we do? The school hasn't taken any efforts to stop him. Like you said when you woke up at the hospital, you need to take matters into your own hands."

"And I'm not leaving you alone in this. If Steven tries anything, I'll be sure to whoop his ass!"

Ryan grinned, shaking his head. "Helen, this is why you're like a sister to me."

"I know. I know." She wiped a tear from her eye, embracing the boy. "I love you too, you goofball."

His day has now began to feel a bit better.

His eyes landed on a crow that stopped on a tree near them as he kept hugging Helen softly.

Perhaps the crow was a sign of good luck.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

He knew it was only a matter of time before things turned back the way they were. Ryan has finally gotten a couple weeks of solace, with no bullying or fighting. For once, he finally began to focus on school more. He began to turn in his homework on time, completed and mostly right. He had taken a test for math, his grade for it exceeding the scores of his previous tests. For once, Ryan felt like he could breath again, like he wasn't chained to a weight.

But then Steven began to stir up trouble again. He had only started small, insulting him under his breath and shooting paper spitballs at the back of his neck.

Then it transitioned into pushing and shoving. Even when Helen had tried to help him, he still got the bad treatment. He wasn't sure how he would be able to get through the last few weeks of school with this happening again.

And then Ryan finally felt himself snap when Helen had tried to help him. She had tried, she truly did, but Steven was craving blood. He had shoved her to the floor, leaving her there while he began to fight with Ryan. The boy hadn't expected it, not prepared at all. He resisted his urge to fight back, biting the feeling back with so much willpower.

Ryan noticed as Helen began to stand up again, walking towards the two. She began to tug Steven away, but he had a death grip on him.

In his angry fit, Steven let go of Ryan, turning around abruptly and sending a punch at the girl's face. She stumbled backwards, a small gasp escaping her gaping mouth. Small tears began to leak from her eyes.

Ryan witnessed this happen. He witnessed Helen, the only person in the entire school that showed him compassion, beginning to cry, her hand on her now swollen cheek. Seeing her so hurt, so damaged....

Something finally snapped. The bites of the ferocious monster within him had finally become too powerful, too overbearing. He finally broke the line between his sane and maniacal self.

Ryan quickly looked around for something to use. Anything would have worked. He just needed to end this once and for all.

A pair of blue scissors entered his sight, the tool laying on a desk one row away.

He quickly got up, effectively dodging Steven's attempt at grabbing him.

Everything had now seemed to go in slow motion. He had picked up the scissors now, walking towards the boy, the monster that hurt him and his best friend.

He grabbed the tool by the plastic handle, allowing the sharpened edges of them to stick out proudly and lustrously.

Steven hadn't noticed the scissors. He was too focused on his primary target: Ryan Bergara. So, it came as an icy shock when Ryan actually stepped forward, the shining tool now glimmering into his eyesight.

Ryan's face was stone cold, his eyes deadened and unmerciful. He had no limits now. The monster wrecking him from the inside had finally been let loose.

Ryan could feel as the scissors's blades rammed into Steven's body, striking right at his heart. The bully's eyes widened at the realization that he was about to die. His eyes quaked anxiously, gazing deeply into Ryan's own eyes. He could see everything now. The boy's windows were now wide open, letting Steven see just how badly everything had turned.

Steven had a few words in his mind, ones he wanted to say for a long time now. He tried his best to choke them out, but he had already felt the blood from his body draining out. He had no time. He needed to tell Ryan the final truth.

"I'm... S-Sorry..." His voice was now only a ghastly whisper.

Ryan's head cocked curiously, before he, too, spoke to him, whispering near his ear.

"I'm not..." His voice hissed as he began to twist the scissors dug deep into the boy's heart. Steven's eyes widened a bit, before he began to go limp. Ryan bared his teeth a bit as he felt Steven's dead body weigh down on him. Still in his deadly rage, he shoved the body forward, making it slam to the floor.

He hadn't noticed how quickly everything had happened. Those feelings... the bloodlust... It had taken over so much that he hadn't noticed anything but the guy he had killed, the fucker that tormented him every moment since 6th grade.

So, he finally snapped back to reality when he heard the voices of the other students in the room. They had watched it all.

"What did you do?" A voice rang out in alarm.

"You... You killed him..."

"You've killed him!"

He could see the blood still draining out of the already dead body of Steven Lim. The only thing impeding the blood from flowing faster was the pair of blue scissors still jammed deep inside the boy's body. Other classmates crowded around him and the corpse, beginning to take pictures, but some just looking away in disgust. Many scared glances were shot at him, and his teacher, who had left the classroom shortly before he fought with Steven, grabbed him by the arm, keeping a death grip on it. The two began to rush to the office, where he was to be kept until the police arrived.

He looked back at the classroom, not feeling any sort of worry, but rather, a sudden need poking at him in the back of his head. The need to commit the same act once more. He looked at his teacher, who gave him a shameful look. He smiled to himself, feeling satisfied with what he did.

He finally got payback for having his heart hurt every day of his teen life.

* * *

It was only after his mother came to visit him in the jail cell that he did begin to feel some regret. Seeing her bloodshot eyes, the bags under them dark and heavy... It tugged at his heartstrings. He wanted to repent for what he did, but that nagging feeling had only grown since he did the deed. He wanted to hug his mom, tell her why he did what he did. 

He knew that he could most likely be let off a bit easily since his action was out of self-defense. Yet, he knew that he couldn't put a stop to these newfound feelings within him. He could try his hardest to fight it off, or shove it to the back of his mind, but it would always come back.

So, as he saw his mother, her hurt eyes shutting, he said sorry.

Sorry for letting her down by killing the boy that kept tormenting him for 6 years now.

And sorry for not letting go of his newfound addiction.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

Ryan had finally left high school. It had been roughly 2 to 3 years since he had become known as the guy that killed his bully. The memory held on to him aggressively. Ever since he had that first experience, he felt like another person had grown out of the ungodly amount of bottled emotions he had. Most of his days were him being in control, but once in a while, he felt the presence there. He could feel that other half of him run its presence against his mind.

Then that fateful day had arrived. The time that he finally had the chance to alleviate those urges, that second half of himself.

It had been on his birthday, his twenty-first birthday to be exact. By this time, he had finally made some friends besides Helen, who had still hung out with him from time to time. However, they were both busy with college and working, so they didn't chat with each other too much anymore.

But finally, after days and days of constant work and brain-melting learning, he got the chance to hang with his friends. With his age now being that for legal drinking, he was taken to a small bar near the college campus, where he was given a special birthday drink. They had all pitched in a bit of money for the food, even Ryan, for he felt just a tinge of guilt if he didn't do so.

He would laugh his ass off to the crazy stories that his friend, TJ, would tell, to the point that he had tears streaming down his face. He had a serious, intense discussion with Mark and Devon, one that revolved around murder conspiracies and supernatural cases.

This particular discussion had sparked a lot of interest within him. The group had spent a good hour and a half just talking about unsolved murders. Ryan had felt so interested that he began to grow an idea in his head. He began to create the idea for a show revolving around unsolved mysteries, but not just supernatural mysteries, but murder mysteries, heist mysteries, etc. He wanted to broaden the already captivating idea of a show discussing unsolved cases. He just needed more time, more planning in order to flesh out this concept.

Overall, Ryan had a perfect twenty-first birthday. He finally had a day where he could chat with all of his close friends, one of the only things left that kept him sane.

By the time he was ready to leave, Helen had approached him, ready to leave with him. Due to it being late and dark, she felt it was best to do so. He shrugged, but agreed to it. They weren't going to drive back home, knowing very well to not do that. He would just walk back with her, even if their apartments were in different locations.

As they continued to walk back home, Ryan kept spacing out. He hadn't drunken much, but he had felt himself turn a bit tipsy. Helen seemed to be feeling the same way. The two hadn't realized that someone was following them, keeping a small distance behind them.

By the time Ryan had reached Helen's apartment, he had finally recovered a bit. His drunken state had begun to dissipate. He gave Helen a small goodnight, before he began to leave the area where her apartment was. Still, he hadn't noticed the same person following him, stalking him intently.

* * *

Ryan continued on to his own path home, his phone showing the way back. However, now that he had nobody else with him, he began to feel his other half edging itself out again. His nails dug into his palms as he tried to push it back down. He didn't need to think about that now. He just needed to get home. 

This path home was way worse than the previous route he had taken with Helen. There were so many discarded glass bottles, trash littered all over the sidewalk. He walked with baby steps, not wanting to step on a shard of glass.

And finally, his ears picked up a tiny sound. The noise of glass crushing under footsteps.

Ryan turned around, finding a tall figure slowly picking up their pace towards him. His eyes widened anxiously as he also began to walk faster. He could hear the footsteps louder now, closer than before. He began to run, his breath beginning to falter a bit. Even as he ran, he tried to dodge the glass scattered in the floor. But, it didn't seem to faze the guy behind him.

And all at once, he heard the footsteps sprinting up to him. Out of fear, he tensed up and tried to run faster. His efforts were in vain, as his jacket got caught by a grip. He was tugged hard, being driven back a bit.

Ryan looked over, finding a guy of about 6 feet. His face was grinning lightly, but not in a nice way. It was a face of evil intent.

"Well, hello there, little guy." The man slurred a bit. "Why are you out here all by yourself?"

"Let me go!" He yelled. "What the hell do you want?"

"Calm down, short stuff..." His voice became soft, and not a good kind of soft. Alarms began to ring inside of Ryan's head, his mind already coming to a horrible conclusion.

"I'm just gonna take care of you a bit." The man cooed, his hand beginning to reach down towards Ryan's backside. Ryan struggled against the contact, wriggling as much as he could, but the grip holding him close prevented him.

"Oh, calm down, son." The man grabbed Ryan harder now. "It'll be over soon enough."

Ryan felt the man's other hand tugging at his pants, exposing him a little. He began to hit the man, throwing punches that seemed to do little. It only frustrated the man more and more.

"Fuck this!" The man now spoke a little louder. "You're getting exactly what you deserve!"

Ryan was thrown to the floor, his body pinned to the floor by the man's upper body weight. His eyes widened fearfully as he knew exactly what was going to happen. He tried to find a way out, tried to find a soul that would save him.

Nothing. Nobody. There wasn't anything to save him.

He began to accept what was coming to him, shamefully beginning to let himself oblige.

Then he saw a lone glass bottle laying a few inches away. It was still intact. However, it wasn't his sane mind that began to grow the notion of using the bottle. His other half, the atrocious part of him, thought about it.

He had always worried about that other half of himself. It always created such dark thoughts. It scared him deeply, sometimes even giving him nightmares. He never wanted to let that part of him feel the pleasure of death and destruction. 

But now, he had no choice. His dignity, his safety, possibly even his life, was on the line. The only thing Ryan could do now was let his other half walk him through the process of killing.

Ryan let himself relax a bit, which, in turn, gave the impression to the man that he was able to relax himself too. Just as he felt the weight on him loosen up a bit, he swiftly dragged himself forward a bit, gaining enough distance to grab the bottle. Immediately, he grabbed it, lifted it, and brought it down quick and hard. The bottom portion shattered to the floor, leaving only the top portion with jagged edges.

He quickly jammed the jagged part into the body above him. He heard a cry of pain, the weight finally getting off of him.

He finally stood back up, the bloodied bottle still in his hands. He could see the man holding the blood-gushing wound on his shoulder. Rage emanated from the man, but seeing the blood from him only brought Ryan's other half forward.

He could feel the bloodlust...

He fucking loved it...

Loved it like a god damned drug!

He went up to the man, jamming the bottle into his stomach. Deeper and deeper, the bottle went inside. Blood spilled to the floor, a puddle forming rather quickly.

So much blood. So much of it. Dopamine spilled more and more into his brain as he continued.

He looked into the man's face now. A wide grin was plastered on his face, but his eyes held no other emotion but amusement.

"C'mon big guy..." He whispered into the man's ear. "Don't you want to penetrate me? Or did I beat you to the punch?"

The man choked a bit on his own blood. "Fuck you..."

"Too late for that...!" He grinned even wider, his eyes glimmering from the moonlight shinning against his eyes. The darkness of the night and the evils of his own soul filled his every inch, his every nook and cranny.

"Night, night, you filthy bastard..."

Ryan twisted the bottle now, just as he had done with Steven and the pair of scissors. He remembered the feeling then and felt the same way now.

The man's eyes finally began to lose their life. Ryan watched as they began to grey up, the atrocious life once within them now drained completely with the blood that dripped to the floor.

He finally stopped. He tugged the bottle out. The other half told him to do so. It was the only evidence there.

And now, nobody would ever know of his first experience with deliberate murder.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

The day after his second kill had been very nerve wracking. He saw the murder on the news, which made him extremely anxious. He felt his time was coming very soon, his time in jail was inevitable. He had stayed inside the whole day, even when Helen had invited him over to her apartment. She had become worried, thinking he had taken that route on that specific night.

He had lied to her though. He had stated that he took a longer way home, as the longer way was more open and exposed to the public.

He couldn't tell her. She'd probably find some shame in him. He decided to keep his mouth shut.

And his other half wasn't making things better. It, too, had been growing restless and excited. He could feel that certain bloodlust rise up like bile, but every time it happened, he swallowed it back down.

Yet, his other half assured him that he was safe. And for some peculiar reason, he had actually taken that claim to heart. It brought some sick form of relief in him, despite the feeling of guilt boiling in the pit of his stomach.

He walked over to his window, taking in some of the weakened sunshine that had tried its hardest to burn through the bunches of grey clouds in the sky. He breathed shakily, but held some determination.

A lone butterfly perched itself on some flowers near his window, its raven-colored wings lightly flapping in the brightness of the faded daylight.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

It had been years now since he had killed that unknown man on his 21st birthday. Since then, he had begun to let his feelings take control of him, bond with him, become one with him. He finished college as soon as possible, not wanting to catch the suspicion of his friends. After he had graduated, he simply told them he'd be moving somewhere in Europe. He didn't tell them where, but he just said that in order to help keep them off his tail.

He hadn't even warned his mother of what he was doing. Since that day, his mind had fused with his other half. He wasn't the Ryan he once was. Though he still held his own emotions, he shared the same feelings as those of his other half. Now, he decided to leave everything behind.

Instead, he moved to a more desolate part of the country: Wyoming.

Since he had arrived, he had the opportunity to kill more. He had racked his numbers up to about 8, and in only the span of a few days.

Unfortunately, he had to leave. The bodies would be found soon enough, and though Ryan was sure that he wouldn't get caught, he didn't want to take any chances.

He caught a taxi, one meant to take him to an airport all the way in Denver. Little did Ryan know this exact taxi would change his life forever. Little did he know he'd be stranded out in the middle of a nowhere, with only a town to keep him housed.

Little did he know that there'd be one man that would change everything he had made for himself since he'd left his old life.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

\- Day ???: _Shane Alexander Madej_

Shane couldn't remember his early life all that much. It had been so long ago, the memories of his childhood buried deep under tons and tons of other memories.

All he could recall about his early childhood was how nice the town of Bullhead had once been. The place had been a little secret sanctuary for the people here. Since people loved his grandfather a lot, even sharing the same feelings for his father, he felt it was such a great life here. The people treated them with such respect and generosity.

He remembered all the times he'd go running down the hill to go into the small convenient store, buying some gum and candy bars. He recalled all the times he would play with the other children there, playing tag or hide and seek. He could still taste the blissful sweetness of the chocolate, of the soothing chewiness of the bubble gum.

His memory went a little fuzzy after that. The only thing he truly remembered when he began to get into his preteen years was the death of his grandfather. He would never forget, not at all.

It had occurred so suddenly. One moment, he was laughing along with a few of the policemen, while Shane had decided to play along with some other kids. Shane had been caught off guard when his grandfather began to complain of his chest pain.

Shane knew of his grandfather's issue. His childish mind hadn't let him realize that it was a serious thing. So, when he saw his grandfather collapse to the floor, his final breathes wasting away, he couldn't truly grasp the severity of the situation.

He tried to talk with his grandfather, but the people crowding around him didn't allow him to get close. He tried to shout, but his own voice was drowned out by those of the people watching as his grandfather began to leave his world.

He was so confused. He was so lost. He pleaded to the people there. He begged for them to move. He just wanted to see his grandfather.

It was too late. Shane couldn't reach his grandfather. He was so close, so so close, yet he was so far. Now, he was gone. His grandfather had left him.

Shane hadn't gotten the chance to bid him a final farewell.

* * *

The days after his grandfather's death had been heavy and dark. His father had him buried in the town's cemetery. His popularity among the residents had garnered the support to have the grave in the middle, a symbol for him being the center of it all. 

Shane's house on the hill had become quieter now. It had been a few days since he went back down the hill. All he wanted to do was let his head stay high up in the clouds, the only place he felt solace at the time. He didn't want to play with the other kids. It was wrong for him to feel this way, but he envied them. They actually had their grandfathers with them.

* * *

He was roughly 12 at the time that his grandfather died. Once that had happened, his father seemed to start focusing on Shane's life. He began to become more strict, more authoritative. He would homeschool him way more now. Shane had grown so confused by the sudden change, but when he asked his father why he was doing all this, he simply stated that it was for him to continue the Madej legacy of running Bullhead. 

Shane tried to accept that he was destined for this path, but he felt a sense of doubt and disdain edge at his heart. He pushed it away. He would follow his path, not for himself, not for his father. He'd do it for his lost grandfather.

* * *

4 years... 

4 years had come and gone...

Shane was 16 years old now. In the four years since his grandfather's death, he had grown, not only physically. His knowledge grew, especially when it came to history. When his father told him many stories originating from many parts of history, he was always so fascinated. His attention was always caught when history was involved. He adored it with a passion.

And Shane had finally adapted to his life in Bullhead again. Finally, he had begun to interact more often with his childhood friends. They still accepted him, despite the many changes they all went through. Unlike Shane, the other kids had grown up being uneducated, unethical, and with a lack of etiquette. But he saw past that. He just wanted to experience his last couple of young years with his old friends.

Unfortunately, Shane had no time for that now. His father had made a huge decision, one that changed him.

His father had decided to take the opportunity for a job in California. Though it was only going to last one year, Shane would have to say goodbye to all of those people he knew. He'd have to leave behind the people he began to care about.

He didn't want to leave, but he didn't want to lose the only chance he had at finally seeing something other than the deserted landscapes of Wyoming.

* * *

When Shane arrived in Los Angeles, California, he hadn't expected it to be so hot. Wearing a black tuxedo in 90 degree heat was a mistake he hadn't realized he made till he arrived. By the time that Shane and his father arrived at their temporary house, he had been ready to discard his clothing. He didn't want anything else but a nice, cold shower. 

He wasn't sure he could adapt to the changes. For his entire life, he was kept confined within the area of Bullhead. He hadn't seen so many people scrambled into one area before. The bustling streets astonished him, as did the blinding sunlight from the California sun. The towering buildings made him, the 6'4" boy, seem like a munchkin. Everything fascinated his once deserted brain. 

When he finally had the chance to relax a bit and unpack his belongings, he was approached by his father.

"Shane, I have something to tell you." His father's voice sounded plain. The boy held no worry, for he hadn't detected any bad news.

"What is it?"

"Well, now that I'm stuck with this job, I won't be able to homeschool you now." He said. "So, I decided you are ready..."

"Ready for what?" He grew confused.

"I think you're ready enough for public schooling." His father stated. "First thing, next week, you'll be attending one of the public high schools in the city."

Shane scoffed a bit. "Father, are you sure it's a good idea? I mean, I haven't even been outside of our hometown. What makes you think I'll be able to handle a school bustling with tons of other teens?"

His father just smiled, grabbing his shoulder.

"I just know you'll get through it. You're a Madej. Madej's don't quit that easily."

Shane just nodded lightly. Though father began to walk into another room, he had stood rooted to his spot.

He didn't know what to expect. He was afraid. He was worried.

But he was also daring, feeling more than capable of handling the new environment. Now he just needed to wait till his time came.

* * *

Shane watched as a large building began to come into view. Though he felt a tinge of nervousness, he suppressed it. He didn't want to show anybody, not even his father, that he was worried. 

His father finally stopped their rental car in front of the building, a high school that had many other students walking into it. He gulped down the feeling that was eating away at him.

Shane stepped out of the car, grabbing his satchel. He gave a small sigh while he watched the crowds and crowds of other kids.

"Good luck on your first day, son!" His father shouted from the car. Shane, confused, turn to him.

"You're not coming in to escort me?"

"Son, I have to get to work." His face frowning a bit. "But I'll make it up to you. When I pick you up, we're going shopping. You can get whatever you'd like!"

Shane smiled a bit, nodding in approval. "Okay."

His father nodded to him, before rolling the window up and driving off.

Shane turned back around, facing the school again. He sucked some air into his lungs, before releasing it. With a determined face, he began to walk towards the building.

Already, from the start, he received some stares. Perhaps it was due to him being new, or perhaps it was due to his extraordinary height. Not everyday did you see a new kid that was six feet tall and was dressed as if he was going to a private school. The fashion of the other kids was... questionable, to say the least.

The other boys there were so oddly dressed in his eyes. They wore pants that seemed way too tight and shirts that just looked a little too plain and bland.

And the girls, by God, weren't any better. All his life, he'd been taught to value women and to respect their bodies. He'd taught himself to not see a lot of revealing parts of a woman, for he felt that it was disrespectful and shameful.

Yet, here he was, walking into his new school, his eyes catching one too many girls with their shoulders revealed, their upper chest areas exposed, and their backs showing. Though it was just a little tinge, Shane felt himself blush.

Finally, he arrived inside the school. It wasn't that large, just barely above average. To him, it was still somewhat fascinating, nonetheless.

The first place he needed to get to was the school's office. He had no idea where that was though. He tried his best to find it, but even with the advantage of being able to look over everybody's heads, he found no room labeled 'Office'.

He continued though, even as the bell rang and he was now left rather lonely in a hallway.

He had no choice now. The only thing he could do was go into a classroom and ask the teacher there if they could direct him to the location of the office. Hopefully that would help him.

He quickly chose a room, slowly walking towards it and giving a quick knock. He patiently waited outside for the door to open. When it did, he found a woman, most likely the teacher. Instantly, he took the chance to talk.

"Um, hi." Shane smiled lightly as he introduced himself.

"Well, hello there. Do you need something, young man?"

"Yeah, I sort of need some help with directions." Shane put his hand to his head as he smiled nervously. "See, I'm new here, but I am having trouble finding the main office. Could you perhaps tell me where it is located?"

The teacher smiled brightly, nodding in approval.

"I'll make it even easier for you. I'll send you off with one of my students." She said. "Let me just ask for a volunteer to see who's willing to take you."

Shane nodded, before he saw the teacher go back into her classroom. Shortly after, the door opened again, but this time, the teacher let a very short girl out.

"Thank you so much for this. That extra credit is going to treat you well, young lady." The teacher smiled at both the girl and at him. She quickly waved at him, before she went back inside.

Shane had to look down in order to see the girl that was taking him. Meanwhile, she did the opposite, having to look up.

"Hi there." The girl greeted, though she seemed a bit shy. "My name's Sara Rubin. What's your name?"

"My name is Shane. Shane Madej." He said with a light smile.

"Well, it's nice to meet you, Shane." Sara said as she lifted her hand up to shake his own hand. He immediately grabbed her tiny hand, shaking it carefully.

"So, I guess I'll just take you to the office now. It's not too far off, anyways."

Shane just nodded.

As they began to walk, he kept looking around, just taking in the sights. He could see more classrooms and some school banners here and there. It was so peculiar to him. He hadn't seen a real high school before.

"So, Shane... Where did you come from?" Sara asked politely. "I mean, you don't have to answer if you don't want to. I was just curious, you know."

Shane smiled at her, while she panicked a bit. Instantly, he knew that Sara wasn't the most extroverted person in the school. He liked it though. She was nice and seemed rather quiet. Perhaps he could try and find her later on in the day and try to talk with her, maybe let her show her true self just a bit.

But for now, all he could do was be the speaker.

"Well, this may sound rather odd, but I actually came from Wyoming." He spoke softly. "And I came with my father for a business opportunity. He said we're staying here for roughly a year, and in that time, he's going to work and I'm attending this school." 

"That's... actually really interesting." Sara stayed. "So, what is life like in Wyoming? Do you just get to be in the plains and watch bison roam around?"

Shane smiled again. "No, it's not like that. We live in a small town called Bullhead. So tiny and desolate, you can't really find it on any maps, at least the ones I've tried to use."

"My life in Bullhead is rather... boring, as much as I hate to say it. Though I enjoy the folks there and it still holds itself as a special place in my heart, I just can't seem to find any sort of entertaining elements there."

"But here, in sunny California, I've been having the time of my life. It's the first time in my life that I've seen the tall skyscrapers I had only read about. Felt the piercing sun and experienced the warmth of it. All of this has been so overwhelming and exciting. I'm truly excited to discover more about this chapter in my life!"

Sara chuckled, covering her mouth with her hand. "You're funny, Shane. I don't know what it is about you. Maybe it's your genuine feelings towards California or just your outlook on the entire situation, but you've really touched me with your words. I can only imagine how great it feels to experience something new."

"Believe me, it's the best feeling I've felt in my life."

Sara only nodded with a smile, before facing forwards again.

"My life is pretty boring, to be honest." Her voice seemed rather solemn. "I don't really go out much. I'm not really the party type. I just like to stay in my house and either make some drawings or snuggle with my cat, Obi, while I watch a movie."

"Well, that doesn't sound boring to me. Heck, I'd give anything just to be able to watch a movie or snuggle with a cat. I've never been able to do any of those things since Bullhead is just so desolate and deserted."

"Well, maybe one day, I can invite you to my house and we can just stay inside and watch movies all day. I'll even let you keep Obi with you the whole time, or at least until he gets annoyed and hides away."

Shane laughed louder now, his smile wide and shinning.

"Sounds like a plan." He said.

Sara nodded in agreement. Her shoulders lowered a bit when she finally began to walk slower. Confused, Shane looked around, finding a hall, and at the very end of it, a room with the word 'Office' labeled above the door. He took that as his queue.

"Well, I guess I'll let you go now." Sara said with a smile. "If you need anything, just try and look for me. I'll be happy to help."

Shane nodded, before he saw her walk away. He began to walk towards the office, but he heard the girl's voice again.

"Wait, Shane!" Sara exclaimed as she quickly walked up to him. "I forgot to ask, but would you perhaps like to hang out with my a couple of my friends and I? We're usually in the cafeteria."

"Sure!" Shane gladly accepted. "I'd love that. I'm always happy to meet some new people."

Sara smiled widely, before nodding and waving at him as she began to walk away again.

Shane turned around to the office, but that wasn't what his mind was on. All he could really think about was Sara and how nice she was.

* * *

Shane walked out of his 5th classroom, or fifth period as the other students called it. Thank God, his classes weren't too difficult. His homeschooling had actually payed off quite a bit. Though he wasn't that far ahead of the other students, his father had at least taught him enough so that he wouldn't be left behind. 

For Shane, it was time for lunch though. Unfortunately, he wasn't sure where the cafeteria was. Hesitantly, Shane walked alongside other students who were hopefully walking to lunch too.

He looked around, trying to find Sara. Her being short wasn't exactly the most helpful thing, but perhaps he could pick her out eventually.

Is that her? No, just someone else. Was that her? No, she didn't have her hair straightened.

Where was Sara? She was supposed to...

"Shane!" A voice called out to him. "Hey! Shane! Over here!"

He tried to look for the voice calling out to him. Rapidly, his head turned from left to right, before he found Sara, who was standing alongside a few other kids. She waved towards him, smiling brightly. He immediately felt a wave of relief hit him as he began to walk in her direction.

"Hi, Shane!" Sara gleamed brightly. "Glad I found you in time. It gets so hectic during lunch, so I was afraid that I wouldn't catch up to you in time."

Shane just nodded, feeling a bit nervous again in the presence of the other kids with her. She read his state of mind rather easy because she quickly caught on to his nervousness.

"Oh, crap." She chuckled lightly. "Sorry, Shane. I forgot to introduce you!"

"Guys, meet Shane Madej!" Sara put her hands up towards him. "He's a new student here."

The first to introduce themselves was a short African-American girl. She raised her hand, a small smile on her face.

"Well, hi there! Name's Quinta! Quinta Brunson."

"It's a pleasure to meet you, Quinta." Shane spoke politely.

"Oh, and these two losers are Curly and Andrew." Quinta pointed towards the two boys standing alongside Sara. "You're welcome, you two!"

"Quinta, shut the hell up!" The boy exclaimed in a somewhat feminine voice. Shane found it a bit odd, but he didn't mind. Perhaps that's just who he was as a person.

"What? You and Andrew are like 5 year olds asking their neighbor for their lost baseball."

"Ay, mejor cállate!" Curly said with hints of sass. He finally went up to Shane, who had only kept his smile during the small scene.

"Yeah, yeah, I know. This must be very weird for you." He stated as he shook Shane's hand. "I'm Curly Velasquez. It's really nice to meet you. Oh, Sara filled me in about you. Hope you have a grand time here in California. I just know you'll find it great!"

"Well, thank you!" Shane gave a genuine smile. He hadn't really expected such a nice response.

"I guess it's my turn now...!" The boy called Andrew had finally walked up, though he still seemed rather nervous. "Well, I'm Andrew Ilnyckyj. I'm actually somewhat new here too, so I sort of know how you feel." 

Shane gave a small grin, shaking his head.

"Well, I'm glad I'm not alone then." He said. "Also, it's very nice to meet you all. I will admit, I was rather nervous at first, but you three seem very nice."

"See, Andrew, I told you he'd be chill." Quinta commented as she nudged the boy. "Unlike you when you first met us. You looked like you had to talk with a ghost or something."

"I was new here! I couldn't help it!"

Shane just felt happy in seeing these new people slowly growing connections with him. Perhaps his temporary life in California wasn't going to be so bad.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

"Shane, we all know you like her." Quinta blurted out just a little to loud for Shane's liking. 

"I don't like her, guys!" He exclaimed, his face beginning to turn red. "It's not what you think. I just really respect her and think she's the greatest. She always makes me happy and is always there for me and..."

He looked at Quinta, Andrew, and Curly, who all had their eyelids lowered sarcastically.

"Okay, so maybe I do like her! But I can't tell her that! She wouldn't like me back."

"Shane, trust me," Quinta began. "I know Sara well. She truly does feel the same way towards you."

"I know she's very introverted and all, but I truly feel like she holds the same feelings. I just think it's that exact aspect of her that's keeping her from telling you."

Shane looked at Quinta with serious, glassy eyes.

"So, you think I have a chance?"

"A chance?" Quinta exclaimed. "Shane, you basically have this in the bag! All you need to do is tell her how you feel. That way, if she actually does reject you, she'll just be aware of how you feel, unlike if you asked her out on a date. Then, that situation actually would turn out to be bad and embarrassing."

Shane just nodded.

"Okay... I'll tell her."

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

"Sara!"

The girl stopped in her tracks as she heard Shane's voice call out to her. Turning around, she found him running up to her, lightly panting.

"Sara, thank god, you haven't left yet." Shane gasped, trying to catch his breath.

Sara grew just a tad bit frustrated. Ever since her feelings for Shane had developed, she had begun to avoid him a little. She would hang out less with her friend group that had included Shane, spending her time more in the library to study and draw. She just didn't have the heart to tell the boy how she felt. She truly loved him, but felt she had no chance.

"Look there's something I need to tell you."

"Can't this wait till tomorrow?" Sara frowned at him over her shoulder. "I just really want to go home right now."

Shane's face fell, his sadness showing. Sara thought about it for a moment, before giving a sigh and fully turning around to face the boy.

"Shane, what is this about?" She asked. "Is something wrong? Do you need help with someone or something?"

"Sara, look..." He closed his eyes, before opening them again. "I need to tell you this. It's been eating away at my mind, at my heart. I haven't had the courage to tell you, at least until now."

"Shane..." Sara looked at him with a questioning stare. "You're worrying me. What is going on?"

"I-" He swallowed hard, sweat beginning to show on his forehead. "I... like you, Sara."

Sara looked at him, before laughing lightly. "I like you, too, Shane. That's why we're friends."

"No, no! I don't just mean it that way. I... like you more than a friend should."

Shane gave a small sigh, before continuing.

"I know I shouldn't have these feelings, but I can't help it. You make me feel so happy and so cheery. When you're with me, I feel like I can go against the world with just my bare hands! You make me feel so small, yet make me feel even bigger, even taller than I already am!"

Shane kneeled on one knee, grabbing Sara's hands and holding them together within his own.

"Sara, I love you. I really do." Shane smiled, his eyes gleaming.

Sara's eyes had collected a pool of tears, her mouth formed into a smile. She immediately hugged Shane, her tears of joy spilling onto his back.

"I love you, too, Shane! I love you so much!"

Shane just laughed out loud, lifting the girl up while they still kept their hug. He span around, their laughter echoing through the school's walls, traveling through the cool air of the day.

The sound of protests directed at them from teachers still in their classes didn't disrupt them, neither did the sound of cars passing or the screeching of crows. Neither held any care for anything else but the love in their embrace.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

"Dad, I need to tell you something." Shane spoke to his father.

"Dad? Well, that's something I don't hear from you everyday!" His father laughed heartily. "I'm glad you aren't calling me father as much anymore. That title was getting old, anyways."

Shane just laughed nervously.

"Anyways, what was it you wanted to tell me?" 

"Dad, I... have a girlfriend..." His voice spoke carefully. His father looked at him for a couple seconds, before he stood up. Shane expected some sort of negative response, but instead, he was given a hug.

"That's my son!" His father let go of him, smiling widely at him. "It's fantastic that you found someone suited for you! It's about time, too! I was starting to think you wouldn't find a partner in crime!"

His father only laughed again. "I'm just joking, Shane, but seriously, I'm proud of you!"

Shane smiled lightly at his father. "Thanks, Dad."

The two kept quiet for a few seconds, before his father broke the silence.

"So, what's her name?" He asked, a curious grin on his face.

"You already know her, Dad. It's Sara! I'm dating her."

"Sara? Your friend, Sara?"

Shane nodded.

"This is old news to me, then! I could tell you two were infatuated with each other like crazy!"

Shane raised an eyebrow in question. "That's... not creepy at all."

Shane's father just laughed again, clapping his son's back.

"It's not. You two just made it really obvious."

He shook his head, smiling at the floor.

"I wish I noticed it earlier. That would've been easier."

"Well, don't think about that anymore." His father said. "What's important is that you confessed to her and finally realized it. That's all that matters."

"Yeah..." Mumbled Shane.

"I guess you're right."

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

Shane walked alongside Curly and Andrew as they headed to the lunch-table they always used. The three kept themselves quiet, none really knowing what to say.

Sara and Quinta weren't present today. Sara had gotten sick and decided to stay home, while Quinta had gone on a field trip with one of her classes. It was just the three boys now.

They sat down in the table's seats, looking at the table or at the work they had sprawled onto it.

"So..." Andrew spoke. "How's everyone been doing?"

"Andrew, is that the best you can come up with?" Curly commented.

"Curly, you weren't even the first to speak. You have no right to tell me shit."

"It's because Quinta and Sara aren't here. When they're here, I always come out as the first speaker."

"Or you just come out, period." Andrew snickered, though Curly just gave a 'tch' in response.

"Speaking of coming out..." Curly began. "Are you going to tell us what happened, Shane? You know, about Sara?"

Shane began to blush a bit, trying to suppress the burning of his face.

"Oh, yeah..." He breathed out. "We got together. She said yes to me."

Curly perked up at those words. He stood up and put his hands to the table.

"Oh. My. God! Yes! Finally!" Curly cheered as he got out of his seat and went to Shane, giving him a hug. "Congrats, Shane! I knew you could do it!"

"Good job, man." Andrew finally joined in. "It was about time, too! Curly and Quinta were like fucking fangirls; wanting to find out what happened and wanting to know whether you two got together. My god, hearing them go on and on about it was hell, I swear to god!"

Shane laughed to Andrew's statement. "Well, that does sound bad. I'm glad you guys at least worried about me and Sara. I don't think I would have ever mustered up the courage to tell her, at least not without you guys."

"Aww, no problem, Shane." Curly gave a soft smile. "That's what friends are for."

"Yeah, what he said." Andrew pointed at Curly. "We're here for you, Shane."

"Thanks guys." He smiled at them.

"I appreciate it a lot."

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

10 months...

10 blissful months...

In those 10 months, Shane had experienced the best days of his life. He had loved Sara so much, finding joy in everything they did together. She was the best thing to ever happen to him. He had finally felt accompanied, like he finally had someone to join in his life journey.

And to say he loved her would always be an understatement. He truly did love her.

But to say that he felt like his life was finally complete would be a lie. Such a goddamn dirty, fucking lie!

Sara Rubin made him feel so much better. She truly did.

But to say that he felt like she was missing something was disgraceful, yet he still had the audacity to tell himself that.

Sara Rubin was the best girl he had ever found. She was something no supermodel could ever compete with, at least in his eyes.

But he still had the dignity to tell himself that perhaps it was just him, that perhaps it was his own doing.

Sara Rubin was the love of his life.

Yet he still had the nerve to lie. 

To lie about feeling like she completed him.

The nerve to lie to Sara.

The insolence to lie to himself.

And the imprudence to get the notion of continuing his festering lie.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

Shane sat outside of the school, on the ledge of the street. He waited for Sara to come. He had finally made up his mind. He was ready to come clean. He was prepared to tell her the truth of how he felt.

He could hear the peaceful chirping of birds, a huge contrast with the loud callings of the crows. He watched cars come and go, and watched people walk right by him.

Everything was going on normally. Life would still go on, as it always did. His confession to Sara wouldn't change anything else but their relationship. He had nothing to worry about...

But that, too, was a lie. 

* * *

15 minutes had passed when Sara finally arrived. She looked so happy and so upbeat. 

"Hey, Shane!" Sara exclaimed as she pecked his cheek. "So, what was it you wanted to tell me?"

"Okay, Sara..." His voice drained out heavily. "You do know that I love you, right?"

"Yeah, of course I do." Sara's happy mood began to fade away a bit. "Is something wrong?"

He breathed in and out slowly, his eyes shutting with the same speed. "Yes, there is.”

“What is it?”

“It’s this.” Shane opened his arms wide. “All of this. All of this is wrong.”

“Shane, what are you talking about.”

“Sara, look. I know that we’ve dated for 10 months now. And I know that, deep inside me, these months have shaped me into a better guy. I have you to thank for that. You’ve made my life so much happier and so much better.”

“Shane, I don’t understand.” Sara began to look at him with hurt in her eyes. “What are you trying to say?”

“I’m saying that despite all of this, all of what we’ve built up, I still feel incomplete. I feel like all that we’ve built together is fantastic, yet I also find it all fake, all a facade erected by my own selfish desires and preferences.”

“I still don’t understand.” Sara asked, though she had turned around now. “Just spit it out, Shane! Stop being so fucking subliminal!”

“I feel like this relationship isn’t complete.” He finally said what he felt. “I don’t know what it is, but I feel like I’m missing something, like you’re missing something.”

Sara finally turned around, though her eyes had begun to collect small beads of tears.

“I thought-” She choked. “I thought you loved me, regardless of how I was.”

“And I do, Sara!” He cupped her face, but she pulled away hastily. “I truly do love you, but I don’t think what’s going on is right. I love you too much to keep on lying to you about how I think this relationship is. I love you so much, and that’s why I don’t want to continue being with you. I don’t want to hurt you anymore than I already have.”

Sara’s entire body shook as she let her eyes flow.

“I’m a selfish bastard, Sara. Please, remember that I loved you with all I could give you. Please, don’t forget that I only broke up with you because I couldn’t keep lying to you.”

“Please, just one day, forgive me for what I said and what I’ve done.”

Sara gave no response.

Instead, she merely grabbed her backpack from the floor. She quickly put it on, before she hastily began to run away, leaving behind only a crude trail made up of fresh tears

Shane stood on the grey sidewalk, watching as the love of his life ran away. He bit back his tears, knowing well that this was better. Now, he wouldn’t ever live his life with her as if it were an act. Now, she could find someone that would truly love her, no matter how she was.

And now he was back to square one, searching for the one that could complete him.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

Just days after he broke up with Sara, he was due to go back to Bullhead. He had decided to not say bye to any of his friends, nor was he ready to see Sara. His heart was still raw from the heavy feelings of that day. 

So, as he sat inside the still taxi outside the house he began to grow accustomed to, he finally let a single tear shed out.

He knew he could come back again to this house one day. His dad had already bought it. They had the chance to come back whenever.

Perhaps he’d come back, maybe when he finally felt it was right to return.

But for now, he would let his friends and his lover live their lives without his interference.

Shane just kept watching the last few moments of his once new life. He soaked in everything, from the faded skies, to the crows soaring above the houses.

He’d miss it.

He’d miss everything he had gotten here. 

... He’d always miss Sara Rubin...

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

Days after he had left California, he felt a sense of homesickness, despite being back in his real home. He missed the things he had back there. 

He missed the sunny days and the general warmth of the place.

He missed the places he visited, the locations he had made memories at.

He missed his friends. He missed Quinta and her motherly attitude. He missed Curly and his sassiness. He missed Andrew and his nervous attitude.

He missed Sara and all the joy she brought.

He missed the life he once had.

And yet, he regretted it all at the same time.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

It happened so fast... He hadn’t even expected it at all. 

His father had died so quickly. The rock that split his head open hadn’t even been that sharp.

Shane didn’t know how to react, how to help. All he could do was call for the help of others and watch as his only family died in front of his eyes.

Except, this time, he wasn’t an innocent child. He was a full adult already, and he understood that his father was basically dead. All he could do was watch his own father bleed away into the afterlife, leaving Shane alone again.

Shane hugged his father, before his last breath escaped slowly.

Shane was alone in his world again.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

Shane had taken the role as mayor of Bullhead now. With both his father and grandfather dead, he was next up to take the position.

His first decision had been to bury his father, not in the graveyard, but in a flat piece of land a few feet away from the Madej house.

That was his first decision, and it had been that way for a few weeks. Shane was clueless on how to run a town. He hadn’t learned soon enough.

His lessons had been done in vain.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

Years came and went. Shane had finally grown well into his position, learning very well how to run Bullhead.

He had decided to stay in the town, not wanting to dishonor his family’s tradition.

He was saddened to realize that he’d never find his missing half...

But as long as he could bring honor to his father’s name, he could care less.

.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.•.

Shane gazed from a large window, watching carefully the citizens of Bullhead doing their own things.

He gave a smug smile as he walked back to his desk.

He’d done it. He had finally done it. He had finally bribed the goods supplier into supplying Bullhead every two weeks. It had taken months and months of hard work and persuasion of both the deliverer and the small company, but he had finally done it.

Shane walked back to his desk, with the smile still on his face. He sat down, just letting himself sink into the seat.

From his mahogany desk, he grasped a mug of coffee, taking a drink from it.

This is the life." The mayor smiled to himself as he put his legs on the desk. "And no one could ever change this for me."

He took another chug as he looked towards the window again, but only finding a lone butterfly floating about.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If y’all caught the foreshadowing and symbolism, good job! 👍👍


End file.
